Title: The Ghost of Millcreek Inn -
Book Two: The Aftermath
By: Char Chaffin and Tess
E-mail: char@chaffin.com and tnv099@aol.com
Distribution: Please let us know first
Spoilers: Not really
Rating: NC-17
Content: Story, Romance, ANGST!
Keywords: MSR
Disclaimer: Some of the characters herein are the property
of Fox and 1013 Productions
Summary: Home from their ill-fated vacation, Mulder and
Scully must find a way to deal with the emotional fallout of
their encounters with Molly Sullivan or lose each other
forever.
Author's Notes:
This story will most likely make absolutely no sense to you
unless you've already read The Ghost of Millcreek Inn Book
One: The Haunting, which can be found at either of our
websites:
char.chaffin.com or
Tess has a new url: www.tessfiles.com
When we set out to write The Ghost of Millcreek Inn, we never
anticipated writing two books. The story was intended to be
Molly Sullivan's story - the woman who lived and died during
the Revolutionary War. Molly had spent more than two
centuries waiting for her lover, Lieutenant William Foxworth,
to return to her as he had pledged and had believed that
Mulder was her beloved Foxworth finally come back for her.
Of course, as we wrote it, we slowly came to realize that
there was a second story to be told. That story was the
emotional impact of Mulder and Scully's encounters with Molly
Sullivan's ghost on their relationship.
The Ghost of Millcreek Inn - Book Two: The Aftermath is that
story. In many ways it is different from anything that we
have ever written in the past. We originally expected that
we would write and post the story shortly after posting Book
One. That did not happen. This story was difficult to
write; to keep the characters recognizable to us - and
hopefully to you, the readers - while putting them into
situations that were never presented to us onscreen. We
spent countless hours chatting with each other trying to work
our way through the various scenes and ultimately Book Two is
the story that we felt we had to write.
We hope that you will find it a faithful rendering of the
characters we know and love and that you will enjoy it.
Char and Tess
The Ghost of Millcreek Inn -
Book Two: The Aftermath
Prologue
October, 2001
Ritz Carlton Hotel
Philadelphia,
Pennsylvania
Scully held Will in her lap as she sat on a plush sofa. Her
weary eyes followed Mulder as he made his way to the
reception desk and reached into the pocket of his leather
jacket to pull out his wallet. She could feel the curious
gazes of the late night staff as they took in the bedraggled
appearance of the hotel's newest guests. Her eyes wandered
over the gilded elegance of the marble-columned lobby of the
Ritz Carlton Hotel.
Immediately upon leaving the grounds of Cliveden, Mulder had
fished his cell phone from his pocket and had placed a call
to the information operator, asking for a listing to the
closest Ritz Carlton Hotel.
"If ever there was a time we deserved to be pampered, it's
now," he had said in reply to Scully's questioning look as
they raced away from the battlefield.
Now, he returned to Scully's side and helped her to her feet.
He pulled her and the baby into a loose embrace.
"Housekeeping is going to bring some of the basic necessities
up to the room," he told her.
"Diapers?" she murmured against his chest.
"And a crib," he confirmed. "Come on." He wrapped an arm
around her waist and led her to a bank of elevators on the
other side of the marble lobby. Scully noted the sympathetic
smile on the desk clerk's face.
"Mulder, what did you tell them?" She craned her head back
to look up into his face. He smoothed a hand over her hair
and tickled Will under the chin.
"I told them we were on vacation and that our flight had been
re-routed through Philadelphia." Mulder ushered Scully into
the waiting elevator. He stabbed the button for the
fourteenth floor with one finger. "I also mentioned that all
of our luggage had been lost."
"What? You didn't think that they would believe the truth?"
she asked wryly. Mulder huffed out a tired laugh as the
elevator silently whisked them upwards. The doors swished
open quietly and they stepped into the hallway. Even here,
the carpets were thick and plush. They quickly found their
room and Mulder slipped the key into the lock and pushed the
door open. Scully stepped into the room and slapped wearily
at the light switch just inside the door. Soft light flooded
the room. Both exhausted, they were only dimly aware of the
understated elegance of the living area of the suite Mulder
had requested.
A quiet knock prompted Mulder to peer through the peephole
before swinging the door open to permit the housekeeping
staff to enter the room. A man in a crisp uniform trundled a
portable crib through the doorway.
"Where would you like me to set this up, Sir?" he asked
politely.
"I want to keep him with us." Scully spoke softly and looked
up at Mulder for confirmation. He nodded toward the bedroom
door.
"Put it in the master bedroom, please," he instructed. A
similarly uniformed woman had followed the man into the room.
She quickly moved toward the bathroom and began to set out
toothbrushes and toothpaste; disposable razors and shaving
cream, as well as a comb and a brush near the basket of
complimentary soaps, shampoo, moisturizer and mouthwash
already on the marble countertop.
She stepped out of the bathroom. "The night manager thought
you might be more comfortable sleeping in this." She
proffered a small bundle to Mulder. He grinned and shook out
an oversized T-shirt bearing a picture of the famous LOVE
sculpture and the words 'Philadelphia, The Place That Loves
You Back'.
"The latest fashion in sleepwear," he smirked. Scully smiled
gratefully at the housekeeper.
"This is perfect. Thank you."
The rest of the bundle contained diapers for Will and another
even larger T-shirt emblazoned with the Phillies logo on it
for Mulder.
Mulder walked the two employees to the door and pulled a tip
out of his wallet. "The hotel has an overnight laundry," the
woman offered as she discreetly slipped the folded bill into
the pocket of her uniform. "There is a bag in the closet in
the bedroom. Just leave the bag of clothes outside the door
and call housekeeping. Someone will come right up to collect
your clothes and they'll be ready for you in the morning."
Mulder leaned against the doorjamb. "Perhaps you could just
tell housekeeping to send someone up in about twenty
minutes?" he asked. The woman smiled and nodded.
"I'll take care of it, Sir."
"Thank you." Mulder swung the door closed. He leaned
against it tiredly and watched Scully and Will disappear into
the bedroom.
Scully called to him softly. "Mulder, would you bring a
towel from the bathroom?" He pushed away from the door and
poked his head into the bathroom, taking brief note of the
huge sunken tub. The idea of soaking in a hot bath was
infinitely appealing, but he was afraid he'd fall asleep and
drown. He snagged a fluffy, white towel from a shelf over
the vanity and carried it into the bedroom.
Scully had pulled Will's clothes from his tiny body and the
baby, wearing nothing but his diaper, was happily kicking his
feet. She took the towel from Mulder's hand and laid it over
the silk bedspread as a changing pad. She lay Will in the
center of the towel and quickly stripped him out of the
soiled diaper and into a clean one. She tugged the cotton
shirt back over the baby's head and fastened the snaps
between his legs. She lifted him and walked over to the
window, pushing back the heavy drapes to stare out over the
city. She swayed back and forth softly and felt Will grow
limp in her arms. She looked up to see Mulder's image
reflected in the glass as he stood behind them. Turning, she
held the baby out and Mulder carried him to the waiting crib.
He settled the little boy into the crib and tugged a soft
blanket over his tiny body. Mulder turned around to find
Scully already stripped out of her clothes. Nude, she
stretched her arms out to her side and rolled her head,
grimacing and then sighing with satisfaction as she loosened
some of the stiffness from her neck and shoulders. She
stuffed all of her dirty clothes into the laundry bag that
she had found in the closet and tugged the oversized T-shirt
over her head.
Mulder quickly followed suit and he crammed his clothes and
Will's into the bag with Scully's. Eschewing the T-shirt
provided by the hotel, he padded naked through the suite,
opening the front door just enough to set the bag onto the
hallway floor and hang the 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the
doorknob.
He returned to the bedroom to find Scully snuggled under the
blankets. Mulder crawled into the bed and she turned and
draped herself over him. She closed her eyes and let her
body melt into his.
"What time is checkout?" she yawned against his chest. She
unconsciously arched her back in response to the fingers
stroking lightly over her spine.
"Noon." His sleepy voice rumbled through his chest and
vibrated under her ear. "But I booked the room for two
nights, so we can sleep as late as we like. Or as late as
the baby will let us," he amended.
Scully's head popped up from his chest. "Are we staying here
two nights?" she asked. Mulder clapped a hand over his mouth
as a huge yawn escaped him.
"We can stay as long as you'd like." He slipped his fingers
under the soft cotton T-shirt and rubbed his hands over the
silken skin of her back.
"I want to go home." Her voice was soft. Tired. Plaintive.
She settled down on him again and tucked her face into the
warm skin of his neck.
"Then, I'll take you home tomorrow," he promised. He made a
mental note to call Mrs. Knaubler at the Millcreek Inn in the
morning to make arrangements to have their belongings shipped
to D.C. Scully grumbled in her sleep when he shifted her off
his chest and onto her side. Mulder curled his body around
hers and tightened his arms around her. A few feet from
their bed, Will shifted and sighed before settling back down.
Safe again... they slept.
**********
Chapter One
November, 2001
Outside the wind picked up, rattling the glass in the windows
of their living room. Rain spattered in uneven patterns over
the side of the building and the sky was inky black. A small
illuminating light from the kitchen was enough to assure
Mulder didn't stub his toe, as he made his way over to the
armchair by the fireplace, and sank into it. The air was a
little cool; the furnace hadn't kicked on yet. Mulder pulled
a soft wool throw from the arm of the chair and unfolded it
over his naked body. He could have put on some clothes, but
found he liked the feel of the wool against his bare skin.
Besides, he didn't want to awaken Scully by digging through
the bedroom when he knew she was asleep.
A quick glance at the Regulator clock on the mantle told him
it was two in the morning. He had to be up in four hours for
work. He was really wiped out... as he rubbed the heels of
his hands into his eyes, Mulder thought about why he couldn't
sleep.
Actually there wasn't a reason he could think of why he
shouldn't be dead to the world, right now. And yet, he
wasn't.
He and Scully had spent a happy but tiring evening playing
with Will. Now six months old and the proud owner of two
teeth, their son had eased off on the teething for the moment
and was sleeping through the night once more. Scully was
just beginning to wean him a little, supplementing his
breast-milk diet with fruit and vegetables, as well as rice
and a more substantial cereal. He was thriving, playing
harder during the day but much more content at night. And he
was just beginning to try raising himself to his hands and
knees and crawling. Another few months and he'd be pulling
himself up to his feet and trying to walk - and then the fun
would really begin.
In the meantime Will was quite a handful just the way he was.
But he'd been a very good baby and had fallen asleep with a
minimum of fussing after a quick nursing. Scully had laid
him down and when she came back to the bedroom and crawled
under the covers with Mulder, who'd been dozing a little, he
turned to snuggle her into his arms and had discovered a
delightfully-naked bed-partner who had chucked her nightgown
as soon as she'd hit the edge of the bed.
It had taken him about one second to shed his pajama bottoms
and another three to get his body into 'erection status'.
They'd made sweet, slow love in the quiet of their bedroom
with nothing more than sighs and whispering moans
accompanying the pounding rain outside. Afterward, Scully
had fallen asleep very quickly but Mulder had been unable to
relax his mind, though his body was beyond sated. He'd risen
from their bed and walked to the living room in the dark, on
silent feet.
They'd been home a month. Thirty days ago they'd escaped
their vacation; it seemed an odd way to describe the
recollection but it had happened just that way. Mulder
rubbed his hand over his jaw wearily. He couldn't begin to
fathom why in hell they couldn't have a normal family
vacation like everyone else did. It was as if the outlandish
and the unexplainable just followed them around like baby
ducks. And it had nothing at all to do with their jobs, for
neither of them worked on the X-Files any longer.
After Will's birth there had been no reason for him to go
back. He had been politely asked to return and had as
politely turned down the offer. It didn't interest him any
longer; that particular fire was gone, burnt out. He had a
family now; it was time to get a more responsible, less
dangerous job.
Because of his background and education he was a very popular
and professionally eligible catch, and had several job offers
before he finally chose a full professorship at Georgetown
University's Psychology department. In the Cognitive
Neuroscience program at Georgetown Mulder had found an
acceptable niche; the field itself was expanding rapidly and
the discipline was one he found exciting enough to hold his
interest and take his mind off eight years of the unexplained
and paranormal.
More or less.
As for Scully, her decision to stay home with Will for at
least a year had been met with disappointment at the Bureau
and with great happiness by her family, especially Bill Jr.
Because of her new status as stay-at-home mother and Mulder's
final split from the Bureau Bill had actually softened quite
a bit toward Mulder and the two had managed to form a wary
truce. Extremely wary - but the tentative bridge thrilled
Scully's mother to no end. It made things a lot easier for
Scully, too.
Mulder stared out the rain-drenched window in the dark,
thinking about the way a 'simple' week of vacation had messed
up their balance - and he couldn't even say why. Before
Lancaster, their lives were busy, to be sure - but fulfilling
and happy. Living with Scully had added a layer of
contentment, something Mulder had always lacked. It went way
beyond the joy of fatherhood and the guarantee of regular
intimacy. For the first time in his life Mulder felt like he
was that 'whole person' he'd once fought to make Scully
acknowledge.
Loving Scully was wonderful. She was passionate and her
libido was a good match for his. The intimacy of their
romantic relationship had enhanced their base friendship; had
truly made them each other's touchstones. Once, they had
both declared it. But never had it seemed to be truer than,
when in their quest for sexual fulfillment and the
possibility of reproduction, they had at last fully merged
their souls. And having felt that level of love and trust
for Scully, Mulder had thought nothing could change or alter
it.
But something had touched it - something had given him pause
to feel a restlessness and a kind of dissatisfaction - no,
that wasn't the right word... a lacking - yes, that was more
accurate. Something was lacking, not completely missing but
certainly not all there, either. What troubled Mulder the
most, though - was the feeling that he could have easily gone
his entire life not knowing what was missing, and been
perfectly content.
And hard on the heels of that revelation was the solid
knowledge that if he thought about it too much, analyzed it
too far, he'd discover way too much - and find himself
confronted by events better left unacknowledged and words
better left unspoken.
***************
Scully opened her eyes and watched Mulder rise from their bed
to move quietly through the darkened room. These late night
sojourns had become more frequent of late, she thought, as he
slipped out of the room and eased the door closed behind him.
She sighed and stretched out one arm to rest her hand on the
rumpled pillow he had abandoned. Scully knew that he
thought she was asleep. Always before, Mulder had been the
first to succumb to sleep after lovemaking. He would rest
his cheek between her breasts or curl his body tightly around
hers and she would listen, as his rapid breathing would slow
until each breath was a rasping sigh of contentment.
But no longer. Now he eased away from her to lay in quiet
stillness until he thought her asleep and instead of
listening to the rhythmic sounds of his breathing, she could
practically hear the thoughts whirling through his mind
before he would steal away to his solitary retreat. Two
nights earlier, Scully had crept to the doorway after he had
left their bed. Peering through the door, she had found him
sprawled in the armchair near the fireplace, a soft woolen
throw tossed carelessly over his body. Tonight, she listened
to the soft thud of his bare feet crossing the floor, the
creaking of the chair as his weight settled into it and the
soft rustle of the throw being shaken out.
Her fingers curled into the cotton of his pillowcase and she
pulled it into her arms. Something was different, she
thought, as she inhaled his scent into her lungs. Her eyes
landed on the glowing red numbers of the digital alarm clock
on the nightstand closest to Mulder's side of the bed. What
sent him brooding into another room four hours before he had
to get up for work? Was he chafing at the ties of
fatherhood? Scully shook her head in mute denial. No, she
told herself as she called up a mental picture of Mulder
smiling in delight at Will's latest antics. He loved being a
father.
Did he miss having his own place? His freedom? He had given
up his apartment at Hegal Place shortly after Will's birth to
move in with her and the baby. The picture frames and
flower-filled vase that had once graced the top of the low
table in the hallway leading to the bedrooms had been removed
to make room for his aquarium. His books were nestled next
to hers on the bookcase. They had both put several pieces of
furniture into storage and the apartment was a comfortable
blend of him and her. Of them. Mulder's basketball rested
in the same plastic tub as Will's toys. His sneakers lay in
a jumble in the bottom of their closet in direct contrast to
the neat array of high-heeled boots and shoes arranged by
color on her side of the closet. When he appeared each night
in the kitchen doorway upon his return from work, sniffing
the air and snooping through the pots and pans on the
stovetop, he always greeted her with a huge smile and a kiss.
He was happy here with them... wasn't he?
It was only now, in the predawn hours, when he would sneak
out of their bed that Scully sensed any sign of discontent.
She closed her eyes and sighed tiredly. And in the darkness,
she finally acknowledged the thought that had been nagging at
her for weeks now. That she knew exactly when things had
begun to change.
Lancaster and the Millcreek Inn.
Lying in a lonely silence broken only by the restless
shifting of her brooding lover in the other room, Scully
stared at the empty expanse of the bed he had abandoned and
she couldn't help but give silent voice to a disquieting
thought...
That Molly Sullivan was still haunting them.
***********
Chapter Two
Three nights later, Scully snapped the dishwasher door
closed and spun the dial to set the wash cycle into
motion. She hoisted Will out of his highchair and set
him on her hip. She bounced the baby up and down once
or twice, eliciting a giggle and the proud display of
two tiny white teeth.
She laughed. "Let's go see what your daddy is up to."
Will slapped her shoulder with one pudgy hand and
gurgled in happy agreement. She carried the baby into
the living room. Mulder was seated at the desk, the
checkbook to their joint account lying open and a stack
of unpaid bills scattered across the desktop. He was
thoroughly engrossed in what he was reading and was
unaware of their entrance into the room.
"Hey, Daddy. Whatcha doing?" Scully hefted Will in
her arms so that she was hiding behind his back and she
pitched her voice up into a silly baby tone. She
curled her fingers around Will's tiny wrist and helped
him wave to his father. The baby's shrieks of laughter
finally grabbed Mulder's attention. He spun in his
chair, dropping the papers he had been reading and
looked up over the tops of his glasses with a grin.
"Hey, Buddy," he called back and returned the wave with
a waggle of his own fingers.
Scully walked over to stand beside Mulder who reached
out to take the baby into his lap. Will stood with his
father's assistance and he clapped his hands against
Mulder's cheeks and squeezed his nose with his fingers.
Something crinkled under Scully's feet and she bent
down to pick up the papers that Mulder had dropped. It
was the invoice from the Millcreek Inn along with a
glossy color brochure and a calendar of scheduled
events taking place in Lancaster over the upcoming
holiday season.
Scully set the brochure onto the desk. "We just wanted
to say hi," she told him as she lifted the baby back
into her arms. "We'll let you get back to work." She
carried Will over to the quilt spread out on the floor
near the fireplace and guided his legs into the fabric
seat of his baby walker. She sat down on the quilt and
lifted a soft ball out of the plastic tub of toys and
gave it to the baby. They played together, she handing
the ball to Will who promptly tossed it onto the floor
with an accompanying giggle before she held it back out
to him. Scully laughed and offered the toy to Will
again. He flung out his hands and she held the ball
just out of his reach before swiping it against the
baby's nose and handing it to him again.
She felt Mulder's stare and she looked up. He was
holding the inn's brochure again and his thumb was
swiping a lazy path over the glossy cover. He had a
faraway look in his eyes, even though he seemed to be
staring directly at her.
The ball bounced harmlessly off her cheek and she
lifted it absentmindedly toward the baby as she stared
back at Mulder. Unbidden, a hazy image flashed before
her mind's eye. Mulder's fingers knotted in her hair;
his eyes glazed and dark with passion. His face,
contorted with an agonized pleasure that she had never
seen before... or since.
She narrowed her eyes, wondering what he saw when he
stared at her like that. Was he seeing her? The
thirty-ish woman with milk-heavy breasts and a soft
stomach that no amount of stomach crunches seemed to
help return it to its taut, pre-pregnancy flatness?
The woman who let her hair grow longer so that she
could tie it back into a pony-tail to protect it from a
baby's inquisitive fingers? Was he seeing the woman
who had looked at him from across a basement office,
who had been seated next to him in countless cars and
airplanes, who had stared at him from hospital beds and
who had peered up at him from the sweat-dampened sheets
of their bed?
Or was he seeing a youthful beauty with curls tumbling
down her back; high, full breasts and a blatant, earthy
sexiness? Unbidden, a red mist of jealousy clouded
Scully's gaze. The thought that had been gnawing at
her heart since the moment she had awakened to find him
standing over her with a wild, primitive, passionate
look etched on his face, flooded her mind.
That it was Molly who had been making love with Mulder.
Molly, who had brought such an expression of lust and
desperation and need to his face. Scully closed her
eyes against the most painful thought of all... that it
was Molly, who even now, captured Mulder's thoughts.
Scully drew in a shaky breath and blew it back out.
She opened her eyes and found Mulder's gaze fixed on
her, a confused expression on his face.
"Are you okay?" He tilted his head to the side and
raised his brows questioningly. Scully nodded
wordlessly and blinked when Will tossed the ball and
hit her squarely in the chest with it. She clutched
the ball in her hands and looked back at Mulder. His
eyes were clear and honest and his lips were curved in
an affectionate, intimate smile aimed directly at her.
She returned his smile shyly and dipped her head as
embarrassed guilt swamped her.
Scully tugged the rubber band from her hair and leaned
toward Will. Her unbound hair swept over her cheeks,
hiding the flush of embarrassment from Mulder's eyes as
she refocused her attention on the baby. She held the
ball out to the Will and let him snatch it from her
unresisting fingers... and she let his baby giggles
hold her fears at bay.
Mulder loved her and was true to her. He would never
cheat on her. He had believed himself to be making
love to her... not to Molly Sullivan.
Later that night... when Mulder once again crept from
their bed... it was a truth and a mantra that she clung
to with all her strength.
*************
Three weeks later
December, 2001
Mulder spun into the bathroom, resisting the urge to
slam the door, letting it close by itself. His hands
gripped the sink as he forced calming breaths through
his nose, blowing them out his mouth. He didn't look
in the mirror, didn't want to see the anger in his own
eyes.
He could hear the clanking of pans and dishes in the
kitchen, as Scully finished loading the dishwasher. He
winced, imagining if she got any louder it would awaken
Will, who'd just been put down for the night. But,
maybe not - he'd been sleeping very soundly these past
few weeks. Still... in his opinion Scully didn't have
anything to be irate about - it hadn't been her
favorite shirt, ruined at the cleaners...
"Mulder, I told you twice already. I did NOT kill your
shirt! I took it to the dry cleaners, as per your
instructions. I told them to use light starch. Again,
as per your instructions." She'd faced him down in the
kitchen, wiping her hands on a dishcloth. Her eyes
held irritated patience at first - until Mulder plucked
the shirt out of its plastic wrapper and shook it in
her face.
"Scully, look at it! There are yellowish streaks all
over it - they used the wrong kind of starch on it.
You obviously told them heavy starch. It's even
written on the receipt." Mulder had plopped his shirt
down on the kitchen counter, crossed his arms and tried
to retain a placid expression, which failed miserably.
Well, he was angry - this was the best and most
expensive shirt in his wardrobe - and of such a fine-
gauge cotton that using heavy starch on it would mean
certain destruction. And Scully had always hated that
shirt... hated the color, which was an unusual shade of
blue. She'd once compared it to a 'mean sky in the
middle of a tornado', and always managed to get in some
sort of dig when he wore it. But she'd never
deliberately tried to sabotage it - until now.
He must have spoken aloud... as he stared, her eyes
narrowed and the tone of her voice warned him that a
line had been crossed. "You think I sabotaged... a
shirt? Are you nuts, Mulder? You don't think I have
better things to do with my time than to kidnap your
shirt, take it to the cleaner and attempt clothing
manslaughter by instructing the clerk to SUFFOCATE it
with extra starch? Jesus!" She glared at him once,
then turned and faced the sink, grabbing the handle of
the first pot she could find. Mulder scraped his
ruined shirt off the kitchen table, before Scully could
beat it to death with the grimy pot - and took himself
off to the bathroom.
Deep breaths. Counting to ten. He looked into the
mirror and saw the anger in his eyes. Again. It had
happened again, within a few days of the last time
something of small consequence had blown into a goddamn
war.
It was getting worse. Mulder admitted this to himself,
as he stared at himself in the mirror and sucked down
calming oxygen.
He didn't understand. They never fought. Barely had
disagreements. In the six months they'd been together
they'd never bickered, not like this. And Mulder
conceded that it had become something more than
bickering, especially lately. It worried him. A lot.
It had started right around the time they'd returned -
well, fled - from their vacation.
Suddenly there was a reduction in tolerance; that was
the best way he could explain it. Mulder knew a great
deal of it was his fault - he'd been unsettled since
their return. Difficulty sleeping at night, his old
insomnia problem resurfacing - feeling as if something
was missing. Again, him. And he didn't know how to
fix it. Wasn't even sure what needed to be fixed...
For the past week he'd been careful to show Scully by
word as well as deed, how much she meant to him - how
happy he was to be living with her and their son. He'd
let small and daily irritants roll off his back; had
gone above and beyond to relieve her of the bulk of
caring for Will when he was being particularly
fractious. He told himself he was making it easier on
both of them... but in reality his actions were
complicating an already-difficult situation.
Mulder wasn't quite sure how his actions were making it
worse - he could only go by the way it felt between
them - and it didn't feel right...
In the bathroom he stared at his unhappy face, and knew
it was up to him to try again - to fix it.
*****************
Chapter Three
Two nights later Mulder got his chance.
It had been almost forty-eight hours of polite calm
from Scully and continuing worry from him. Thankfully
Will had been angelic and on his best behavior, so any
stress forming was not coming from his direction.
They hadn't made love since two days before the 'shirt
war' as Mulder had come to think of it - and Mulder was
feeling the physical neglect very sharply. It was the
longest they'd gone without some form of intimacy since
Will's birth. Mulder knew that days could easily
stretch into weeks, with each empty day solidifying the
rift, until going back and fixing it would be just
about impossible.
He didn't plan anything grandiose, nothing complicated.
He brought home a delicious shrimp and lobster dinner
from Franco's and picked up a nice bottle of wine. He
snuck the food and drink into the kitchen when Scully
was in the bathroom bathing Will. By the time she came
into the kitchen with an armful of sleepy baby snuggled
into his pajamas, Mulder had candles glowing on the
table and fragrant seafood and rice pilaf mounded on
plates, crusty sourdough bread dripping with butter and
glasses of wine breathing, all ready to be consumed.
Scully skidded to a halt and took in the sumptuous
spread, her mouth hanging open - then her gaze swiveled
to Mulder, standing beside the table with a soft smile
on his face. She blinked a few times, her nose
twitching at all the delectable smells; she broke into
a bemused smile and queried, "Mulder... what's going
on?"
Ten minutes later Will was in bed, fast asleep, and his
parents were enjoying a romantic feast. Everything was
delicious, from the succulent lobster to the burnt
creme the restaurant had so thoughtfully provided.
They each had three glasses of wine and neither was
feeling any pain.
Scully pushed herself away from her dessert plate and
groaned, holding her stomach. "No more... I can't eat
another bite. I'm dying over here!" At Mulder's
chuckle she looked up into his smiling face; he'd come
around the table when she was busy rubbing at her
stuffed tummy and had missed him moving toward her.
Now she quirked an eyebrow at him when he reached down
and pulled her gently to her feet; slipping his arms
around her waist he hauled her into his chest and
breathed into her ear, "Does that mean you can't handle
Phase II of the dessert?"
"What's 'Phase II' entail, specifically?"
He nibbled the reply over her lobe, adoring the shiver
she released against him. "That's where I get to have
my dessert..."
She deadpanned, "But you already ate your burnt creme,
Mulder... aren't you full yet?"
At her amused question, Mulder caught her lips with his
and kissed her softly, then whispered into her mouth,
"Not even close, baby. I want more..."
"How much more?"
"I'll show you..."
In the bedroom Mulder lit three candles while Scully
finished up in the bathroom. He found himself actually
shaking with excitement. Four days without sex... to
think he'd once gone years without it, save whatever
manual ease he could give himself. In his mind that
counted for nothing at all; it had only staved off the
tension and never did anything to sate him.
He knew the first year of life with a new baby was one
serious settling-in period. And his and Scully's
intimate time together had gotten short-changed not
only by his absence during her pregnancy but her
infection directly after childbirth and her body's own
lengthy recuperative time frame. His own restlessness
of late hadn't helped, either - and Mulder knew she
could tell he had a lot on his mind.
But not tonight. It was going to be all about Scully,
tonight. What she liked. What she wanted, needed...
and in giving to her he knew he'd find everything he
wanted for himself, for hadn't that always been the
case between them? Nothing had changed it... nothing.
Had it?
When Scully came out of the bathroom on a cloud of
something softly spicy, tinged with flowers... Mulder
was reclined on their bed, naked except for a pair of
pajama bottoms, his appreciative nose sniffing her
scent and feeling himself start to tighten in reaction.
She smelled delicious - she would taste even better.
Wearing a pale green silk tank and matching panties,
Scully moved to the side of the bed, and sat down next
to him. When he held out a hand to her she placed her
palm against his, smiling when he brought her hand to
his mouth and kissed it lingeringly, knowing how much
she liked it. His eyes darkened as they roved over
her, so lovely and so damn enticing in her silky little
pajamas. Her hair was a mass of red flame around her
head and her gaze was brightly blue and fierce upon
him. He tugged at her hand and Scully fell into his
arms.
God... this was it. This was what he'd needed, all
week. This touch. This embrace, this kiss, this...
everything. Oh, they'd made up after their fight, but
it hadn't involved anything past the words and the hug
and kiss. The rift had still hung between them. But
now... that rift seemed silly in the extreme and a
million miles away.
Mulder nuzzled at the sweet-smelling neck under his
nose, smiling when she shivered and her fingers
clutched at his arms. He wriggled himself between her
thighs and pressed down on her teasingly, before
murmuring to her, "I threw away that shirt, Scully..."
She huffed out a startled laugh against his throat.
"You're kidding. After all of that hoo-ha about starch
and sabotage and whatnot, you tossed your favorite
shirt?" She pushed at him, enough to see into his
face. He fought down a flush and nodded, then leaned
in to bite-kiss at her lips gently.
"Yes. I did. The shirt wasn't worth the potential
loss of the one person who has better taste in clothes
than I do..."
She snorted. "You've got a thing going with Ralph
Lauren?"
"Oh, yeah. That gray hair of his simply sets me
aflame, baby..."
After that bit of silliness, no more words were
necessary. Mulder set about telling his woman -
without words - of how much he'd missed her, these past
four days. With his hands, he told her, fingers
trailing over and around each taut rosy peak of her
breasts; with his lips he left her in no doubt of his
desire and his need, kissing his way along the same
path his hands had just traversed. With his eyes he
adored her; with his body he cherished every inch of
sweet skin that curled against him.
So soft... so adorably sweet... his woman. His Scully.
He hated to be at odds with her, for whatever large or
small reason. Never again -
Their sighs rose and mingled in the moist air of their
bedroom, as they kissed and caressed with mounting
fervor. Mulder was ravenous for her and it showed in
each deep kiss he gave and every touch of fire he left
on Scully's skin. He tangled his fingers though her
wet curls, tugged lightly - heard her ragged moan as
she reacted to him. She smelled delicious; smelled of
hot wet aroused woman. God... he slid down her body,
clamped his hands around her hips and tilted them up to
meet his greedy mouth. And when he fastened his lips
around her swollen clit, she jumped and cried out, a
strangled wordless plea...
"MulllllGoddddd...!"
Mulder held her tightly, loving the way she shuddered
against him, the way she pulled at his hair - the way
her legs trembled and quaked. So goddamn good... he
slipped a hand beneath her hips to support her, and his
index finger pressed between her slippery cheeks. She
gasped. And that sound triggered a memory in him, of a
night of passion he could still recall with stunning
detail, not so long ago - how a small hand had touched
him and wet fingers had glided within, to rub, press -
enflame him. It had been amazing... surely if he'd
combusted in reaction to that deep massage, so would
Scully.
He had to try it - had to give her that feeling. Had
to see if she'd combust, go up in flames, there in his
arms, against his mouth... on his tongue. He had to.
Mulder lifted his head, paused in his ministrations,
until Scully opened glazed eyes and stared at him in
confusion. But before she could utter a protest, he'd
brought his glistening fingers to his mouth, and was
licking at them, drinking in her wetness. She moaned
again, couldn't seem to take her eyes from what he was
doing, as he cleaned her from his fingers, then left
his index finger in his mouth, soaking it in his
saliva. Her eyes widened as he took that finger from
his mouth, then bent his head and took possession of
her clit once more, laving it with his tongue - gently,
so gently - he could feel her tense up with the need
for release, heard her hissing moan, felt her fingers
digging into his scalp -
And felt the way her entire body jerked when he slipped
his wet finger between her taut cheeks, and slid it
inside, just a little...
"Don't!"
Her ragged protest stopped him, cold.
He let her go, let his hand slip from her, let his
mouth release her, and eyed her in concern. Scully
stared down at him with damp eyes gone wide with...
shock. Mulder was seeing shock, that familiar look of
her from over a month ago when in his passion he'd felt
her withdrawal from him, the night she came to herself
and the realization that she'd been a helpless
participant in a game of desire she hadn't instigated.
Jesus... what had he been thinking?
That was just it... he hadn't allowed himself to think
- he'd acted on feeling and feeling alone. That she
would accept it - that she would revel in it, in the
feel of something so intensely personal, so incredibly
arousing. Something different - something dark and
good. He'd thought she'd enjoy it the same way he'd
loved it, when she had done it to him.
Well, judging by the shock in her face and the sound of
her protest still echoing in the silent room... guess
not.
He eased himself away and up, until he lay on the
pillow next to her, still staring into her eyes. And
he murmured the only thing he could think to murmur, at
the moment. "Are you okay?"
Scully blinked at the question, and moved away from him
to sit up, hugging her knees to her chest. "Yes. I'm
all right. You just... you took me by surprise,
Mulder. I wasn't expecting... that."
"Did you like it? Would you -"
She interrupted him bluntly. "No. I don't. I
wouldn't. Mulder, nobody has ever... I would never
let... I don't like... that."
He tossed her a puzzled, "How do you know if you'd like
it or dislike it, if you'd never tried it before,
Scully?" She just shook her head and looked down at
her hands. Mulder reached out and tugged at the
fingers closest to him, until she raised her head and
glanced at him, a pink flush on her face.
She stammered. "I just know. I wouldn't have to - I
just know I wouldn't like it, that's all!" She pulled
her hand away.
Mulder found himself frowning in confusion, feeling the
familiar beginnings of irritation at her closed mind.
"Scully... I thought we were past the point where you
just discount something because you haven't experienced
it." He reached out for her hand again and gave her
limp fingers a squeeze. "What's really going on? Talk
to me..."
"No, I don't think talking about this serves any
purpose, Mulder. It's something I don't like. That's
all." Her voice was firm but he could see her bottom
lip tremble a little - and he knew there had to be much
more than what she'd said - or not said, in this case.
And he wasn't about to let it go - that's not what
their relationship was about. In the years they'd been
together both as partners and the months they'd spent
as lovers, they'd learned not to avoid subjects for
long. They'd kept it honest... and he wouldn't let her
start to hide things again, not now.
Mulder took a deep breath, and chose his words
carefully. "Scully... I want our love life to be
wonderful and exciting for both of us -"
As soon as the words were out of his mouth he knew he'd
said the wrong thing. Scully turned to him and the
anger in her eyes was easy to see.
"You're telling me that what we now have together ISN'T
wonderful? Isn't exciting? At least, not as wonderful
and as exciting as I think it is. Sounds like that's
what you're saying to me, Mulder." Her eyes never
wavered from his, and her hands clenched the sheets.
Even in the dim light he could see how white her
knuckles had gone...
Shit. This was not going well - he tried again. "No,
baby- that's not what I'm saying, not what I meant. I
love the way we make love - love everything we do. I
adore it. Tonight, I wanted to make you feel cherished
and loved and I wanted to send you straight to
heaven..."
Her voice was quivering when she interrupted him.
"Mulder... your lovemaking already does that for me.
When you love me it sends me to the stars - it always
has. Whatever made you think it didn't? Don't I
always let you know, maybe not in words but in the way
my body responds to yours? Can't you tell how much I
love what you do for me?"
Oh God, of course he could tell - she loved the way he
loved her. But he wanted more for her; he wanted her
to fly higher than the clouds; wanted her to know how
incredibly erotic some acts of love could be, now that
he'd had a taste of them...
And his mind refused to say why, or how that taste had
come about, as Mulder slipped his arms around her bare
waist and pulled her closer. Scully came, slowly.
Hesitation, Jesus - she was acting hesitant, around
him.
Shit.
He pressed soft kisses to her mouth, her cheeks,
murmuring to her, "I don't want to fight about this,
baby. Please... I'm sorry. Please - come to bed with
me, I just want to love you..." He eased their bodies
back on the mussed bed sheets and breathed a sigh of
relief when she let him take her down. He lay on his
side and tangled their limbs together, legs opened to
each other - arms clutching eager flesh close, then
closer. When she moved a thigh over his hip Mulder
sent two tender fingers inside her, stimulating her
anew, then sighed again when his hard flesh merged with
her slippery silk and he plunged deep.
Slow. Deeper. Faster. Then harder. The way she
liked it best - the way her body responded to him, the
best. He locked his mouth to hers and drank in her
moans, her breathless purrs - tongue to tongue, kiss
for kiss. When she tightened around him and shuddered,
cried out - he rolled her fully beneath him and thrust
harder and faster, prolonging her climax for as long as
he could, before succumbing to the hot waves, and
following her under.
He collapsed against her, shaky and sweating. Pressed
his damp forehead into her neck. Felt her soft kiss on
his hair. Responded to her hands curling over his back
and stroking over his wet shoulders. Stayed inside her
until he couldn't stay there any longer, and let
himself slip out gently. Lovingly.
Gave her the afterglow she loved the best - gave her
the ease she adored. The ease he loved, as well...
Knew the moment she'd fallen asleep, and whispered an
almost inaudible, "I love you" into her tender nape,
before carefully extricating his body, and rising from
her warm comfort.
And as he made his silent and usual way to the armchair
in the living room and grabbed a soft throw to wrap
around him... Mulder tried not to think about another
kind of satisfaction - and how much he'd really wanted
it just that way, instead of that ease he'd found, with
his lover.
***************
Chapter Four
December, 2001
Scully smiled at the elderly gentleman who held the
door to the bookstore open for her to push the baby
stroller through.
"Thank you, very much," she said. Her smiled deepened
as he touched his fingers to the brim of his hat in a
courtly gesture.
"You're welcome." His voice was soft with age. "Got
to get that little one out of the cold. He waggled
gnarled fingers at Will. "That's a handsome boy you
have there, Miss."
Scully glanced down at the baby. His cheeks bore
bright red patches of color from the sharp December
cold and his eyes sparkled as he gleefully smacked his
juice cup against the small tray of his stroller.
"He is," she murmured proudly. The wind kicked up,
swirling about their legs as they stood in the entryway
of the store.
"Best be going." The man tugged the collar of his coat
over his neck. "Have a good day," he offered as he
stepped outside.
"Thank you. You do the same." They exchanged a final
smile and Scully turned to push the stroller away from
the doorway and into the warmth of the store.
"Feels good in here huh, Will?" Scully squatted down
and unzipped the baby's coat. She plucked the fleecy
cap from his head and stuffed it and his jacket into
the little basket beneath the stroller. She tugged off
her own coat and draped it over the collapsed hood of
the stroller. She consulted the store directory and
pushed Will through the wide aisles stopping before the
bookcases in the 'Self-Help' and 'Relationship' aisles.
It was mid-morning and the store was mostly empty.
Scully knew that it would grow busier as the lunch
crowd trooped in to get a jump on their holiday
shopping, so she and Will had made the effort to get
out of the house as soon as possible. The baby was
babbling to himself and Scully handed him her keys to
play with as she scanned the bookshelves.
Twenty minutes later, she pushed the stroller toward a
secluded corner of the store and flopped down into an
overstuffed chair with several books. Will had nodded
off and was enjoying his midmorning nap. She carefully
eased the stroller seat back so that the baby's chin
wasn't falling onto his chest and he lifted heavy eyes
to peer sleepily at her for a moment.
"Shh." She stroked her fingers over his tummy and
pried a stuffed bunny from under his well-padded rear.
He clutched the toy to his chest and rolled his head to
the side as he sank back into sleep. Scully watched
his tiny chest rise and fall for several moments before
she settled back in her chair. She sorted through the
books in her lap and selected one at random, stuffing
the other three books onto the cushion beside her.
Pulling back the cover, she idly flipped through the
book.
I'm not a prude, she thought moodily. She'd had
several relationships throughout her adult life and she
had always enjoyed sex. She loved the sex that she
shared with Mulder, but lately... it didn't seem to be
enough for him. She leaned her head against the back
of the chair and looked down at Will's peaceful face.
She wasn't a prude but prior experiences had made her a
little hesitant to initiate sex or to experiment. Jack
had been... intense. She remembered describing him as
being incapable of relaxing, as relentless and
determined. While the sex between them had been every
bit as intense as his personality - it hadn't lent
itself toward playfulness or experimentation. And
Daniel... Scully scrubbed her hands over her face as if
to wash away the memories. Strictly a missionary
position kind of guy, Daniel had been shocked and put
off by any suggestion of aggression on her part and his
reaction had left her feeling inept and vaguely
ashamed. To be honest, the entire affair had left her
feeling very ashamed...
Scully opened the book again and stared sightlessly
down at the pages, the words and pictures blurring as
her focus remained turned inward. She had spent more
than seven years repressing her desire for Mulder. At
first unwilling to become involved in another
relationship that would be deemed inappropriate by
herself and those around her, and then afraid to
jeopardize the most important friendship she had ever
had in her life, she had ruthlessly pretended not to
notice how desperately attracted she had been to her
partner.
She knew that Mulder was a highly sexed man. The sly
innuendos, the magazines and videos she occasionally
found peeking out from beneath the rubble scattered
over the coffee table in his apartment... the way he
had always stood so close to her; had always put his
hands on her in even the most innocent of ways... had
caused her to spend many sleepless nights fantasizing
about his hands on her in ways not so innocent.
When they finally did cross that line, when they had at
last permitted themselves to admit their love and
desire for one another, their lovemaking had been the
most amazing experience of her life. To be bonded to
this man who was the other half of her soul. They had
touched one another with love and passion, with lust
and romance. They had moments where they treasured and
cherished one another and others filled with
desperation and hunger.
And in the newness of it... they thought they had
forever to learn everything there was to know about the
other. But they didn't - and all too soon, Mulder had
been taken away from her. And when he came back, she
was two-thirds of the way through a difficult
pregnancy. A prolonged healing from a post-delivery
infection had followed. After Will's birth, she had
found her focus shifting to the baby, something primal
and deep causing her to be alert to his every need at
the exclusion of everything else. The exhaustion of
caring for an infant combined with the sudden changes
in her life, as she became a stay-at-home mother, often
left her feeling less than sexy and attractive.
When the hell was she supposed to have the time or the
inclination toward being the sex kitten he suddenly
seemed to want? She felt the resentment boiling
beneath the surface and sighed as she recognized how
defensive she had become.
Scully had planned their trip to Lancaster in part to
find a way for her and Mulder to reconnect and
rediscover one another. She had intended for it to
serve as an opportunity for them to spend time together
away from the daily grind of their everyday lives.
Instead, she couldn't help thinking that they came home
further apart than ever before. And she couldn't shake
the feeling that she had lost a part of Mulder to Molly
Sullivan. Restlessly, she stacked the books in her lap
and tapped her fingers on the cover of the top book.
She knew that Mulder loved her; that he was in love
with her. But lately, he seemed to need something
more, to want something more than she was giving to
him. Scully was afraid that he had found that elusive
something in Molly and that she had lost a part of
Mulder to the memory of the long-dead woman. Jealousy
and anger flared briefly before she tamped them back
down with the studied calm that had served her so well
as a federal officer of the law.
Her upbringing - the admonishments of her parents and
her church - as well as her relationships with Jack and
Daniel had left her feeling awkward and uncertain -
afraid of... and ashamed of her natural curiosities
toward sex. She had spent most of her life suppressing
those desires and curiosities, telling herself that she
was wrong for wanting those things. Her innate shyness
left her uncertain of her abilities to entice and
attract.
But she'd be damned if she would lose Mulder to the
memory of a ghost. While she hadn't won every battle,
she had never backed down from a fight and she wasn't
about to start now.
Regardless of how inane it seemed to be engaging battle
with a ghost...
Resolute, she pushed herself to her feet and shrugged
into her coat. She carefully eased Will's arms into
his jacket and zipped it up before tugging his hat over
his reddish-brown hair. Scully chose two books and put
the others back onto the bookshelves. She struggled
against the urge to bury her selections in a stack of
other books. Struggled against it and lost.
She added a thriller from the bestseller's list and two
soft-sided, plastic-coated baby books for Will to gnaw
on to his heart's content to her pile and carried her
selections to the counter. And immediately felt
foolish when the bored clerk rang up her purchases and
stuffed them into a shopping bag without blinking an
eye.
She was now the proud owner of the 'Illustrated Guide
to Kama Sutra' and '101 Ways to Please Your Man'.
God help her.
**********
"When sitting facing her, you grasp her ankles and
fasten them like a chain behind your neck and she grips
her toes as you make love, this is the delightful
'Padme' - the Lotus position."
Scully wrinkled her brow and read the paragraph again
and then studied the picture carefully. She looked
around the room and then stood and dragged the maple
valet stand that she had bought for Mulder over to the
bed. She lifted the suit jacket he had hanging from
the valet and draped it over the cedar chest at the
foot of the bed. Sitting down on the mattress, she
lifted her feet onto the valet and locked her ankles
around the top of the hanger as if it were Mulder's
neck. She leaned forward and stretched her hands
towards her feet. Straining, her fingers brushed
against the tips of her toes, but a shooting pain
through her side had her flopping back onto the
mattress. Gasping, she opened the button at the
waistband of her jeans and lowered the zipper. God
knows she wouldn't be wearing such restrictive clothing
if she and Mulder were to actually try this.
Less encumbered by her clothes, Scully raised her feet
onto the valet and stretched toward them with renewed
purpose. She struggled and her fingers flailed toward
her toes before gaining purchase. She curled her hands
around her toes, panting with the effort. She held the
position for several seconds before an inability to
breathe and a vicious cramp forming in her calf had her
falling back onto the bed in defeat.
"Oh God," she groaned. Her fingers played over the
soft roundness of her stomach that was the legacy of
her pregnancy. "I'm so out of shape." She sat up and
tried again. When her hands were firmly wrapped around
her toes, she looked up and caught a glimpse of herself
in the cheval mirror in one corner of the bedroom. Her
cheeks were stained a blotchy red from her exertions,
beads of sweat trickled over her temples causing her
hair to frizz and curl and her face bore a look of grim
determination.
"Oh yeah, Dana. Very sexy." Scully fell back onto her
elbows in disgust. Rolling onto her stomach she
dragged the book toward her again. Perhaps it would be
best if she didn't start out with something so...
complex, she considered. She flipped through the book
and its beautifully erotic, Hindu-inspired
illustrations. The less strenuous positions were, of
course, the more ordinary and basic of lovemaking
positions and not a far cry from those that she and
Mulder had already tried.
She needed something different. Something that would
catch his attention and make him forget about Lancaster
and Molly Sullivan. She continued to read.
"Lift the lady's feet until her soles lie perfectly
parallel, one to each side of her slender throat, cup
her breasts and enjoy her... this technique is called
'Uthkanta' or Throat-high." Scully's mouth dropped
open as she studied the illustration. "I don't think
so."
She flipped forward through the book. "Seated, the lady
raises one foot to point vertically over her head and
steadies it with her hands, offering up her 'yoni' for
lovemaking - this is 'Mayura' - the Peacock."
Experimentally, Scully lifted one foot over her head.
Reaching up to hold her foot steady as instructed in
the book, she chanced a glance toward the mirror.
"This is crazy!" she groused. How the hell was she
supposed to be sexy when all of the positions left her
feeling out of shape and ridiculous? She flipped
through a few more pages, mumbling instructions.
"Sitting face to face in bed, her breasts pressed tight
against your chest, let each of you lock heels behind
the other's waist, and lean back clasping one another's
wrists." She tilted her head to the side. "Hmmm."
Not quite as adventurous as the other techniques, but
definitely different from anything they had done. It
might be a possibility... She used a scrap of paper to
mark the page and set the book to one side.
**********
Two nights later
Scully stood in the middle of the bedroom facing the
cheval mirror. She stretched her arms over her head
and pointed her fingers toward the ceiling, then slowly
began to bend forward, curling her torso toward her
knees. She bobbed down carefully, fingers touching her
calves and then her toes. She shifted her legs and
breathed steadily as she tried to place her hands flat
onto the carpet between her feet.
"What are you doing?"
Startled, Scully lost her balance and tumbled to the
floor. Sprawled in an inelegant heap on the carpet,
she pushed her hair out of her eyes and looked up to
find Mulder standing in the bedroom doorway, watching
with curious eyes. She scrambled to her feet and made
an effort at smoothing her hair.
"Just stretching," she said with a studied casualness.
He lifted one brow in a fair imitation of her
expression of disbelief and she hurriedly stretched her
arms over her head again. Clasping her hands together,
she pulled her arms from side to side and twisted at
the waist in what she hoped was a convincing show.
"Going for a run?" He glanced toward the darkness on
the other side of the windows. Scully gave up and
dropped her arms to her sides. So much for limbering
up first, she thought. She sighed and walked toward
the bathroom.
"What's the score?" she called out as she hurriedly
brushed her teeth. She pulled her hair into a sloppy
ponytail and splashed cold water onto her face. She
was hoping to redirect Mulder's attention to the
football game he had been watching so that she could
slip back into the bedroom and change into the sexy,
deep red, silk pajamas that she had bought earlier in
the day when he had settled onto the sofa with Will to
watch the first of several ball games.
She looked at herself in the mirror. She had plans for
this evening and they did not include trying to seduce
Mulder while dressed in the oversized sweats she was
currently wearing.
"Tied at the half." Mulder's voice was loud and
unexpectedly close. Her face buried in a towel, she
had not realized that he had followed her into the
bathroom. Startled, she dropped the towel and turned
around, but he was blocking her path out of the small
room. His hands settled on her hips and pushed under
the hem of her sweatshirt to caress the soft skin of
her stomach.
Obviously, he had lost interest in the game. Scully
closed her eyes as his fingers inched closer to her
breasts. She had weaned Will down to only a bedtime
feeding each night and although she suspected that
Mulder privately mourned the loss of those more
voluptuous curves, the good news was that she once
again just about fit into the collection of pretty,
lacy, frothy bras and panties that had always been her
weakness.
The bad news was that all of those pretty undergarments
were in the bureau with the sexy red pajamas, and
beneath her sweats she was wearing what she considered
to be truly ugly underwear. Mulder would take one look
at her clad in the functional - but less than inspiring
bra and panties - and completely lose interest.
"Why don't you go back to the game," she tried again to
get rid of him, "and I'll slip into something a little
more comfortable and join you in a few minutes?" His
hand slid up her back to pop out of the neckline of her
shirt and tug on the rubber band securing her ponytail
in place. Her hair fell over her shoulders and his
hand once again disappeared beneath the fleece-lined
cotton shirt. As his fingers skimmed over her back, he
paused long enough to unsnap the hooks of her bra.
"Why don't you just slip out of your clothes
altogether?" he countered and slid both hands under her
loosened bra to cup her breasts. His thumbs swiped a
lazy path over her and her nipples immediately reacted
to his touch, rising against his palms and begging for
his attention.
He nuzzled his face into her throat and she rubbed her
cheek against the day-old stubble darkening his jaw.
Mulder banded his arms around her waist and lifted her
onto the small ledge that ran along the wall between
the sink and toilet.
Scully was fast losing control of the situation and she
placed her hands against his chest and pushed firmly
until he was forced to take a step back.
"Let's go into the bedroom," she suggested. His head
snapped up and down in a quick nod of agreement before
he caught her hand in his and began to drag her out of
the small room. She gasped as he pushed her shoulders
and followed her down onto the mattress. Scully
squirmed from beneath him until she was kneeling on the
bed beside him.
"Come here," he demanded and propped himself on his
elbows. Scully tore her sweatshirt over her head and
skimmed the straps of her bra over her arms, tossing
both garments onto the floor. She fumbled with the
drawstring of her sweatpants for a moment before
hooking her fingers into the elastic waistbands of both
her sweatpants and underwear and hurriedly stripping
them down her legs. Nude, she knelt in the center of
the bed and sat back on her heels.
"Your turn," she instructed. She placed her hands on
her thighs and watched him scramble out of his clothes,
eager desire written all over his face. When he was
naked, he reached for her, intent on pulling her
beneath him again, but she stopped him with one hand
pressed against his heart. He stared at her, confused.
"No," she whispered. "Like this." She urged him to
sit up and used her hands to push his thighs apart.
Crawling over the bed, she climbed into his lap and
straddled his legs. Scully curled one leg around his
hips and slipped her hand beneath one of his arms to
lay it flat on his back. Inching closer to him, she
locked her eyes on his face and saw his cheeks flush
when she lifted her left leg and laid it over his right
shoulder. His eyes darkened and he clamped his hand
over her leg, securing it in place on his shoulder.
His other arm curled around her waist and he helped to
lift her into position.
Her breath stuttered from her lungs as his body
penetrated hers. She knotted her fingers in his hair
and tightened her free leg around his hips, hitching
herself closer, forcing him deeper.
This position didn't allow for much movement. Instead,
Mulder remained buried deep inside of her and they
rocked against one another. He leaned his face against
her leg and rasped his bristled cheek against the side
of her knee. His gaze was cast downward at the place
where their bodies were joined. He dropped his hands
onto her hips and his fingers dug tightly into her
flesh as he pulled her impossibly closer.
The feel of him pulsing within was nice, and of course
she always loved their physical connection - but Scully
soon realized she'd been too hasty, engaging
intercourse before Mulder had a chance to stimulate
her. And even as the thought came to her, so did the
fleeting self-derision that her less-than romantic
approach was cramping the mood, so to speak... Scully
mentally shook it off and tried to concentrate on the
way he felt inside of her -
But she could hear the change in the pitch of his
breathing as Mulder drew ever nearer his climax. He was
panting and her leg almost slipped from his sweat-slick
shoulder. She was nowhere close to orgasm. She
thought that maybe if she could just... reach between
their bodies... She unclenched her fingers from his
hair and immediately lost her balance, falling
backwards and almost severing their connection.
Mulder's arms wrapped around her in a vice-like grip
and he hauled her back up.
This position wasn't going to work for her. His body
felt good, so deeply buried in hers, but she couldn't
quite get the right angle... couldn't concentrate as
the leg slung over his shoulder began to cramp
painfully... it was time to concede defeat - and save
her poor leg from becoming gangrenous with a pressure-
induced blood clot -
Scully curved her hand behind Mulder's neck and brushed
her lips against his.
"Now," she whispered and bore down on him with her
internal muscles, wringing a cry from his throat as he
exploded into her. His arms convulsed around her as he
spent himself. Exhausted, he fell back and her leg
slipped from his shoulder. She followed him down and
stretched her body over his, straightening her leg and
flexing the abused muscles gratefully.
Mulder rolled her onto her back and rose up on one
elbow above her. "That was... but you didn't... did
you?" His eyes were still dilated as they gazed down
at her.
Scully merely smiled and drew his face down. She
brushed her mouth over his and then parted her lips to
deepen the kiss. Breaking free, she curled against him
and laid her cheek on his arm, pulling him down to rest
on the pillow. She didn't answer him with words and to
her relief Mulder didn't pursue it. He relaxed and
cuddled closer to her.
As she felt him slide under sleep's embrace, she
cautiously pulled her sore leg toward her, bending the
knee and flexing the tight muscles. Tonight's
experiment had been successful in one respect, but she
had spent too much time concentrating on maintaining
the position... perhaps next time she should try
something else...
***********
He wasn't asleep.
As he lay with Scully in his arms, her soft and
slightly snuffled breathing indicating deep slumber,
Mulder let his thoughts overtake him - and most of them
were not... great.
He wasn't quite sure what that new position had been
all about. Not that he hadn't enjoyed it; of course he
had! Any time he found himself deeply buried within
the woman he loved, it was a wonderful thing. The heat
of her, the wet cling, all around him... the way she
shuddered when she came. He loved it.
But she hadn't climaxed tonight. Thankfully she hadn't
faked it, either. He once dated a woman who faked
orgasm often enough to make him feel like a sexual
failure; it took him years to get past the idea that it
had been all his fault. As he'd gained experience not
only with women but with life in general, Mulder had
come to understand and accept that sexual intimacy had
as much to do with the mind as it had to do with the
body.
For him, sexual fulfillment meant experiencing the
wonder of his woman coming apart in his hands. Knowing
and exulting in the knowledge that she felt what she
did as a result of what he gave to her - and in return,
reacting to her orgasm and reaching his own pinnacle
because of the way she felt when she peaked. One of
the reasons he would gently refuse her offer of ease,
back when she was recuperating from Will's birth, was
because without her ability to share in the experience
it just didn't mean as much. Mulder had found himself
patiently waiting until she was ready - for her body
and her mind to fully engage with his.
He reveled in the way her breath hitched when she was
excited; the purring words of encouragement she was
just beginning to feel comfortable moaning in his ear.
Could anything be more wonderful than the way she
tightened all around him, her inner walls squeezing
him, at the height of her climax? It's what spurred
him, seduced him, and made their love so utterly
amazing. But this time he'd missed her getting there
with him. Mulder smoothed a hand over her bare hip,
quieting her when she moved restlessly against him.
Scully sighed in her sleep and burrowed her face deeper
into her pillow, body stilling beneath his palm.
Mulder left his hand warmly cupping her hip, and
thought about the past week.
He knew her sudden interest in alternative positions
had to be a result of the things he'd said to her, when
he'd told her he'd 'just wanted to try something new'.
He'd hurt her feelings, made her feel as though she
wasn't enough for him... even though he'd said that all
he wanted was for her to reach the stars -
Well, tonight she sure hadn't left the ground.
As the night outside their bedroom window lightened
into dawn, Mulder pondered how in hell he could
possibly make this right - how he could take it back to
the way it had been between them, a week or so before
their ill-fated vacation.
*******************
Chapter Five
The next night
"Is he asleep?" Scully looked up as Mulder crept out
of the nursery and eased the door closed behind him.
He flopped onto the sofa next to her and squinted at
the television screen.
"You're watching the preview channel?" He watched for
several seconds as the grid of television listings
slowly scrolled up the screen.
"Pay-Per-View." Scully stood up and glanced at her
watch. "Come on. We've got about twelve minutes to
make some popcorn and get something to drink. She held
out her hands and pulled him to his feet, laughing when
he pretended to stumble and fell into her. He squeezed
her tightly in his arms and lowered his mouth to hers.
A moment later, Scully pulled away with a determined,
"We're gonna miss the movie." She pressed one last
smacking kiss to his mouth and stepped out of his arms.
Mulder heaved a regretful sigh and followed her into
the kitchen. A few moments later, Scully shook a bag
of microwave popcorn into a large bowl. She was
reaching into the refrigerator for two bottles of beer
when she heard the microwave start up again. Scully
wrinkled her nose in distaste as Mulder pulled out a
small measuring cup filled with melted butter. He
grabbed a second bowl out of the cupboard and dumped
half of the popcorn into the bowl, drenching it with
the melted butter.
Scully handed him a bottle of beer and carried her bowl
of untainted popcorn into the living room. Mulder
tipped back his bottle and took a long swallow of beer
before ambling into the room behind her.
They settled onto the sofa. Mulder dug into his bowl,
searched for the kernels of corn that were absolutely
saturated with butter and popped them into his mouth
with a near mechanical precision. The chatter of the
preview channel's host was abruptly cut off when the
movie started. As a low, throbbing, cheesy guitar riff
began to filter into the room overridden by the sound
of a woman moaning, Mulder sucked in a breath and
inhaled a tiny piece of popcorn down the wrong pipe.
Scully immediately turned to him and began to pat him
on the back while peering into his face to be sure he
wasn't choking.
"Here." She handed him his beer when he finally
stopped coughing and sputtering. Her eyes were soft
with concern.
"Are you okay?"
He nodded and pointed without making a sound. Scully's
eyes widened as she followed his pointing fingers
toward the television screen where a surgically
enhanced actress was bent forward over a table -
theatrically moaning and gasping - while an actor
plunged into her from behind.
"What movie did you order?" Mulder wheezed. Scully
snatched up the cable guide magazine and rapidly
flipped through it, all the while keeping one eye on
the screen.
"I must have pressed the wrong buttons on the remote,"
she muttered. "I thought I was ordering 'Men in
Black'." She paused as she finally found the page she
was looking for.
"Ohhh." Scully bit her lip and handed him the
magazine. He looked down to where she was pointing and
biting back a laugh, read the movie title aloud.
"Men in Back."
Her face was study of wide-eyed innocence before she
turned her attention back to the screen where one of
the title characters was grunting and groaning and to
her ears, sounding as if he was close to dying.
Mulder took a sip of beer and waited for her to turn
off the television but she merely sat back and scooped
popcorn into her mouth. He thought of the exaggerated
look of innocence on her face and smiled into his beer.
On purpose, it would seem - still trying things on 'for
size'... His penis stirred to life with the
realization that she had planned the whole thing. With
that realization came his determination that tonight
she'd hit those stars - and pass them like a shot, all
the way to heaven.
Mulder set aside his own bowl of popcorn and slid
closer, draping one arm over her shoulder. He spent
the next few minutes dividing his attention between the
movie and Scully's face as she watched the onscreen
antics. Her intent concentration; the way she licked
popcorn crumbs from her lips as she stared at the
screen - the way her hand tightened around her beer
bottle as the sex on the TV screen sped up. Mulder
focused on the grip of her fingers, imagining them
around his already hard and aching penis - and stifled
a groan. He wasn't ready to act yet - he wanted to see
how far she'd let this go.
The scene changed and her brow furrowed as two young
beauties began to eagerly strip the clothing from a man
who was - to be kind - decidedly too unattractive to
warrant such enthusiasm. Scully pointed her bottle
toward the screen.
"Yeah... right. I'm supposed to believe that a man
that homely and unattractive could get not just one,
but TWO beautiful women - half his age - to want to
have sex with him?" She snorted. "These movies really
are a guy's fantasy!" Suddenly, her eyes widened and
she actually leaned forward as the two women finished
peeling the man's pants down his legs - finally
revealing the true pull of his attraction.
"Oh my God!" she breathed, her eyes riveted to the
screen.
Mulder winced and shifted as his aroused flesh strained
uncomfortably against the fly of his jeans. He was
suddenly jealous of the way Scully was so raptly
entranced by the movie. He glanced down at his lap.
Maybe it was time to distract her before he suffered by
comparison. He knew anyone measuring less than two
feet in the groin would suffer in comparison to 'Mr.
Tripod' up on the screen - but that didn't stop him
from feeling momentarily inferior. He carefully set
his beer on the low coffee table.
Seconds later Scully squeaked as he suddenly yanked her
onto the floor.
"Forget about him." Mulder's breath was hot in her
ear. "I can give you everything you need." He pinned
her to the carpet with his big, warm body. Scully
pushed her hair away from her face and peered up at him
speculatively. Everything, huh?
She wormed one hand between their bodies and cupped him
through the well-washed and worn denim of his favorite
jeans. He was rock hard already... Her fingers busily
traced and measured his length until he thought he
would burst through the sturdy metal zipper. Jesus...
felt incredible...
Mulder groaned and pushed against her hand, encouraging
further exploration with each pumping movement of his
hips. Scully hid a private smile - this was working
out exactly the way she had hoped. She had set out to
seduce him until there was room in his mind for only
her and judging by his harsh breathing and the way he
chanted her name over and over again, she was
succeeding.
Scully felt a heady rush of power. Of lust. Of
possessiveness. He's mine, she thought. She curled
her legs around him, lifted her hips from the floor and
ground herself against him. She ran her hands under
his T-shirt and skimmed them over the damp flesh of his
back. She could feel him shudder when she lightly
scraped her nails across his shoulders.
A piercing shriek from the television caught her
attention and she looked up, distracted. Onscreen, the
man was thrusting vigorously into one of the women.
With each thrust, he was grunting and groaning,
completely unintelligible - while the woman kneeling
before him screamed and mewled and whimpered. The
other woman watched, caressing each of them in turn,
all the while snarling out commands.
"That's right. Harder, baby," she called to the man.
"Oh yeah, you like that don't you," she sneered at the
woman. The faces of each of the people onscreen were
contorted into grimaces that Scully assumed were a
display of the sum total of their acting skills. The
entire thing was so ridiculous and so unattractively
NOT sexy that Scully started to laugh. She snickered
at first, causing Mulder to lift his head from his
exploration of the soft skin beneath her jaw.
"What?" He noticed that she was watching the movie
again. Well, that would never do... He nudged her
cheek with his fingers to divert her attention.
"Hey... remember me?" he asked.
Scully looked up, her blue eyes filled with mirth. She
twined her arms around his neck and pulled his mouth
down to hers. She tried losing herself in their kiss
and in the heat of his body pressed against hers, but a
loud screeching 'Oh yeah! Oh yeah!' penetrated the fog
of desire surrounded her and her lips curved against
his in a smile. She studiously avoided looking at the
television but, if possible, that only made things
worse as the sounds emanating from it were even more
ridiculous without the assistance of a visual aid.
At a particularly loud and impassioned shriek, Scully's
body shook beneath his as a belly laugh worked its way
up to her throat. She pulled away from Mulder's lips
and clapped a hand over her mouth to hold it back but
the music was building to a tawdry crescendo as were
the moans and shrieks, and with each 'oh, baby' a
giggle slipped from between her lips.
Mulder lifted his head again - it was impossible to
kiss her at the moment - and glared at her with mock
sternness. This was becoming way too distracting. And
it was a hell of a mood-breaker...
He stared down into her eyes, demanding, "What's so
funny?" She shook her head and scrubbed her hands over
her face in an effort at regaining her composure.
"I'm sorry." She tried to settle her lips into a
straight line and swallowed another laugh. "But that
is just... just one of the most absurd things I've ever
seen!"
Mulder glanced toward the television. To him it looked
just like any one of the porn movies he had seen over
the years - nothing unusual to it. But Scully
obviously found it hilarious. And laughter was
wonderful, but not when he was overheated and wanting
nothing more than to get her in the same condition.
Mulder eyed the remote control, but it was out of
reach. He wasn't about to let her go just to snap off
a TV set. She'd just have to focus on him instead of
an ugly yet well-hung man and the women who used him...
Meanwhile, Scully had chanced another peek at the
screen - taking a moment to marvel at the stamina of
the actors. She screwed her eyes closed as another
giggle threatened to erupt. This was ridiculous and she
knew she shouldn't let the antics onscreen affect her
this way... but little tremors of suppressed laughter
wracked her body even as Mulder set himself to the task
of pulling her attention away from the movie and back
to him.
His busy fingers went to work on the buttons of her
shirt and he smiled triumphantly against her breast
when he heard her sigh and felt her body go limp
beneath him. This was more like it... she felt
wonderful. Silky taut skin under his fingers, God...
nothing in the world felt better. He passed a hand
underneath her breast and lifted it to his mouth.
Scully rolled her head against the carpet, losing
herself in the sensation of Mulder's lips pressing
against the aching tip of her breast. Her eyes opened
as his lips roved over her skin and while one part of
her brain was engaged in the pleasures he was creating,
the other part could not help but notice that the
actors in the movie were moaning and crying out in
supposed ecstasy, but their mouths were not moving.
When she realized that the vocals had been dubbed, she
began to lose her composure.
Scully struggled valiantly against the image of the
actors standing in recording studio, gasping and
screeching into microphones with bored looks on their
faces. But when Mulder ground his hips into hers and
gasped, "Oh yeah!" against her breast, a shrieking
laugh exploded from her. His head instantly jerked up
and he stared at her in shock. She clamped both of her
hands over her mouth, but the giggles continued to
burble in her chest. Her entire body shook with
helpless laughter and when the actors onscreen began to
shout in supposed rapture, she lost it.
Her body heaved beneath his and she actually bucked him
off as she rolled onto her stomach. Mulder watched
with equal parts amusement and frustration as she
gasped with laughter. Every time she thought she had
regained control, she would take a look at his stunned
face and lose it all over again.
Mulder had never seen her like this - and while part of
him was enjoying her mirth, another part desperately
wanted her to stop. As a mood-killer, it was a
definite success. He could feel himself deflating with
each burst of laughter. His brows snapped together in
a frown, and as if she could feel it, Scully stared at
him helplessly, shoulders still shaking.
"I... I'm sorry. I'm sorry," she chanted as she slowly
began to calm. Tears streamed from her eyes and she
wiped her hands over her face before reaching for him.
"I'm okay," she promised through a tiny snort of
residual laughter.
Mulder's lips curved into a resigned smile. Maybe
she'd finally gotten all of it out of her system... She
was adorable - not a word he usually used to describe
her - but in this case that's what she was. He wanted
her badly, but when he cautiously lowered his mouth to
hers again, her body quivered with another suppressed
laugh - and it was just too much. Mulder gave up and
heaved himself to his feet.
"Don't go." Scully sat up and held out both hands.
"I'll stop. I promise."
Mulder eyed her speculatively but he could see how
difficult it was for her to maintain her composure. He
shook his head at her. "No, I don't think so, baby.
You're not in the mood - and neither am I, right now.
I'm going for a run." He bent down and brushed a kiss
over her forehead, then turned toward the bedroom to
toss on his sweats.
Scully sighed heavily, leaning back against the sofa.
Well, that had been an unmitigated flop...
****************
Chapter Six
With Christmas only a few weeks away, Mulder and Will
were out taking care of some holiday shopping. Scully
took advantage of the quiet to do some more reading.
Movie night had been a complete disaster. Obviously,
the dubious merits of porn were lost on her. She
grabbed a note tablet on which she had written various
ideas and crossed 'porn' off her list.
The campaign she was waging to drive the memory of
Molly's lovemaking from his mind was pretty much a
dismal failure, she thought. A comedy of errors. She
was determined to succeed though - and she stretched
out over the bed with '101 Ways to Please Your Man'. A
couple of hours passed as she read and scribbled notes
onto her tablet. Scully stretched her arms and rolled
onto her stomach. Propping herself onto her elbows,
she flipped to the next chapter and began to read
attentively. Mulder never seemed to have any
complaints when she took him into her mouth, but maybe
there was something here to be learned.
She skimmed through the chapter; stopping when she hit
a subchapter entitled 'Advanced Lessons', she began to
read aloud.
"Don't bore your man. Keep things fresh by alternating
techniques. Drive him crazy by humming as you slide
your mouth up and down his penis. Wrap your thumb and
forefinger tightly around the base as you suckle the
head between your lips.
"Buy some strong peppermints and suck on them before
taking him into your mouth. You'll enjoy the minty
fresh taste and he'll go wild with the sensations.
"Don't focus solely on his penis and abandon the rest
of him. Scratch your nails over his stomach; tangle
your fingers in his hair. Cup his balls in your hand;
nibble on his thighs.
"The inside of your mouth is hot... trying surprising
him by taking a drink of something cold before
engulfing him in your mouth."
A sound from the doorway caught her attention and she
looked up to find Mulder staring at her with wide eyes.
His face was an odd blend of shock and lust. Will was
sound asleep on his shoulder.
"Wha... what are you reading?" He moved into the room
and Scully slammed the book shut and hid it behind her.
Her face flamed with embarrassment. He reached out to
grab the book from her hands and she scrambled off the
bed.
"No!" Her voice was loud and Will stirred in his
father's arms, a tiny whimper escaping his lips.
Mulder smoothed his hand over the baby's head, narrowed
eyes taking in the hot blush on her cheeks. What the
hell was she up to? In his arms, Will began fidgeting.
Mulder sighed.
"I'll be right back." He carried Will from the room
and Scully hurriedly began to gather her books and
notes up. She slammed a bureau drawer closed and
jumped guiltily when Mulder returned.
"Come on, Scully." He crossed the room and she
maintained a defensive position in front of the bureau.
Mulder reached around her and hooked his fingers around
the handle of the drawer.
"Mulder... don't." She pulled on his arm and tried to
move him away but he merely wrapped his hands around
her arms and lifted her out of the way. He yanked open
the drawer and pushed aside her lingerie. His eyes lit
up and he pulled out the first thing he saw.
Interesting choice of reading material...
"Illustrated Guide to Kama Sutra," he murmured and
delightedly began to flip through the book, pausing as
some of the more intriguing pictures caught his eye.
Scully tried grabbing the book from his hands but he
held it out of her reach.
"I want to see," he told her before turning back to
rummage through the drawer. He pulled out '101 Ways to
Please Your Man' and her notes. His delighted
expression turned serious as he began to flip through
the books. He noted that she had tagged various pages
with yellow Post-It flags. She had used a pink marker
to highlight a number of paragraphs in the books. Her
notepad was covered with her plans for seduction. He
frowned at the filled-out notepad. A planned
seduction...
"What is this?" he asked. Scully shook her head,
unsure of how to answer. Mulder's frown deepened.
"What IS this?" he asked again. He rapidly flipped
through the books again and when he looked up the
expression on his face did not bode well.
"You're what... you're studying?" he asked
incredulously. "Taking notes?" Scully nodded,
miserable at having been caught. Now he would know
beyond a doubt that she was not a naturally creative
bed partner.
Mulder took a deep breath, fighting a losing battle to
keep his sudden anger at bay. "Why the hell are you
doing this?" he demanded.
Scully swallowed. "I thought it would help. I... I
thought I could learn something..." Her voice trailed
off when he shook his head and skimmed through her
notepad, obviously seeing the events of the last few
nights outlined in her neat handwriting.
It was all there... Jesus! He passed his hand over his
face and slammed the books down onto the top of the
bureau. He was furious. Mulder clenched his hands
into fists, still staring down at the books.
Scully felt the first stirrings of panic settle in.
She moved a step closer. "Why are you so angry?" she
asked hesitantly. His head snapped up, a confused frown
on his face.
"I want to know why you're doing this." His eyes were
dark with emotion.
"You said..." She gulped and pressed her fist against
her hammering heart. "You said you wanted to try new
things," she reminded him.
He gaped at her. "I wanted spontaneity! Exploration!
You're treating our sex life like it's an exam you have
to cram for!" His voice was accusatory. "Highlighting
the pertinent chapters. Christ! You've got an outline
here!" He slapped his hand down on top of the books.
"I don't understand why this bothers you so much."
Scully carefully controlled her voice. She was
humiliated at having been caught.
Mulder shook his head as he processed her words.
Didn't understand... He sputtered, "You don't know why
I'm upset to find out that everything we've done over
the last few nights has been carefully plotted out by
you beforehand? You don't know why it bothers me that
you've been 'cramming' ahead of time to make love to
me?" His voice was incredulous. He could not believe
she saw nothing wrong with what she'd done; couldn't
grasp why he was angry. Shit, more than angry...
betrayed. He felt betrayed. And it all showed, there
on his face; when she looked into his eyes, she saw it
too.
Oh, God... Scully sank down onto the mattress and ran
her fingers through her hair, raking it back behind her
ears.
"Mulder..." She pressed her fingertips against her
forehead, feeling a headache brewing behind her eyes.
"This is the way I do things," she told him. She
looked up beseechingly, willing him to hear her out and
understand.
"I've got ten books on child-rearing. I read at least
five books on pregnancy and devoured every magazine
article about expectant mothers that I could get my
hands on." Her expression told him that he should
already know this about her.
"I've got half a dozen cookbooks in the kitchen and I
painstakingly follow the recipes. I don't even think
about experimenting until I've cooked the meal at least
a dozen times."
His silence was unnerving; his stare unwavering.
Scully blew out a frustrated breath, knowing she wasn't
getting through to him. "This is who I am!" she
reminded him. "I read. I highlight. I take notes.
It's how I learn." She swallowed hard, refusing to
cry. "It's what I do!"
Mulder looked past her to the books stacked haphazardly
on top of the bureau before returning his gaze to hers.
She didn't get it. It was impossible for him to wrap
his mind around it; that she just didn't see a reason
for his anger. His hurt.
"I..." he shook his head. "I can't talk about this
now." Hurt colored his voice as he turned on his heel
and left the room. Scully rose from the bed and
crossed the room. She carefully aligned the books and
laid her notepad on top of them. She slid her pen
through the spiral binding of the notebook and pulled
open the bureau drawer. She moved things around and
set the books into the drawer, then stacked her neatly
folded lingerie on top of them. Precision and control.
Order. It's how she liked things.
As she pushed the drawer closed, she heard Will fussing
in his nursery. She laid her forehead against the cool
wood of the bureau and took a deep breath. Will was
whimpering loudly now and she pushed away from the
bureau to go to her son.
Things were going from bad to worse.
**********************
Mulder walked along the quiet street, hands buried in
the deep pockets of his jacket. Hatless, his hair
glistened with the snow that was intermittently
falling. His ears were growing cold but he really
didn't feel it. Actually, he wasn't feeling much of
anything. And in his head the same words spun
themselves around, again and again...
<I'm not overreacting. I'm not...>
His mind's eye could see Scully's face when she was
pleading for him to understand. Why she felt the need
to take notes. Why she had to write it down, what
kinds of 'study habits' she seemed to feel were
necessary. Mostly, WHY she seemed to think studying
was necessary.
He hadn't overreacted.
He knew he wasn't by any stretch of the imagination a
'red-hot' lover. He hadn't been involved that many
times in his life - but what relationships he'd had,
whatever their seriousness, had been open-minded and
enjoyable. He'd learned a lot, by experience and by
the viewing of more than a few of those videos he liked
to deny watching.
He'd looked forward to trying different things, with
Scully - but there hadn't really been all that much
opportunity either before Will's birth, or after it -
for experimenting. Both of them were always tired -
Scully certainly more so than he - and it always seemed
easier to make love in the most expedient manner. Of
course it was wonderful. Loving Scully was the best
experience of his life, regardless of whether or not
they could take their time or had to hurry it along.
It was all good...
The snow was falling faster now and Mulder turned up
the collar of his jacket in an attempt to keep the wet
stuff off his neck. He walked on, still thinking. How
good it was - how he'd wanted to have the opportunity
to make it better, for Scully. How those opportunities
had come few and far between, until their vacation at
Millcreek Inn.
How they'd both been looking forward to it, couldn't
wait to get there and relax, spend quality time with
Will - with each other. Time to snuggle in bed before
a cozy fire, sip some wine - try something new...
Instead they'd been forced into a sort of bizarre
ghost-hunt, with near-disastrous results. They'd
escaped - from their own vacation.
Over a month later, their daily schedule was still
insane and rushed. Even though Will had tapered off on
the teething and the midnight crying sessions - and had
responded well to the weaning process - he and Scully
were still tired every night and their lovemaking had
fallen back into the same familiar pattern as before.
Certainly it was not a bad thing - but there was so
much more, out there...
Mulder didn't think it was unreasonable to want that
'more' from the intimate side of their relationship.
He had always thought Scully wanted the same thing.
It's what growing together was all about... the need to
explore, to learn and to apply. It had never been his
intention to make her feel less than desirable, less
than sexy and beautiful and everything he ever wanted
in a woman. To him she was all of that, and more.
It was also never his intention to make her feel so out
of balance with him, that she figured the only way to
please him was to study up on sexual techniques and
take copious notes as if a pop quiz was right around
the corner. Not his intention to see her subjugate her
own satisfaction in an attempt to give him what she
thought he needed.
He hadn't overreacted.
But he'd made her feel less than everything he knew her
to be... and somehow he was going to have to find a way
to fix it - before it spiraled out of their ability to
grasp hold and repair what damage had been done.
****************
Chapter Seven
After Mulder returned to the apartment, hurt feelings
on both their parts simmered beneath the surface for
the rest of the evening. He'd entered quietly,
shedding his damp jacket and hanging it up in the
closet; leaving his wet boots by the door. He'd
collected a towel from the bathroom and dried his hair,
then walked into the living room where Scully sat,
holding Will who had awoken wet and hungry. She'd
looked up when he sat down beside her, had given him a
small smile but hadn't spoken to him - and in return he
hadn't said anything much to her. They sat side by
side on the sofa and Scully had rocked Will until the
baby finally dropped off. Mulder had silently held out
his arms into which she'd placed the warm weight of
their son, watching as he left the room. He carried
the baby to the nursery and got him settled in. He
reentered the living room, resumed his place on the
sofa and they had watched the game in silence.
On this night, Scully didn't watch Mulder leave their
bed - because he'd never joined her in it. Instead, he
had watched the rest of the game and then, seemingly
transfixed by the late-night sports wrap-up shows, had
wished her a good night. Confused by his silence and
the gentle kiss he'd placed on her forehead, Scully had
retired to bed, alone. Hours had passed while she
watched the flickering blue light of the television
stream from the living room through the half-open
bedroom door before she finally fell into an exhausted
sleep.
While Mulder was at work the next day, Scully spent her
time tending to Will and mechanically taking care of
the myriad of chores and errands that made up her day.
She was beginning to wonder if trying to outperform
Molly Sullivan was a wise idea. She couldn't help but
question whether she had been wrong all this time.
Mulder never made mention of Molly. The rivalry
appeared to be solely in Scully's mind and in trying to
compete, she was failing miserably.
By the time he had returned home from work, she had
come to a decision. She would put her jealousies and
self-doubts to rest. A femme fatale she would never
be... but she would do her best to be more open-minded
about their sex life and hopefully together, they would
find a way that worked for both of them.
It seemed they had both spent the day putting aside
hurt feelings and misconceptions. The atmosphere during
dinner was less strained. No mention of the prior
evening was made, as they were determined to put it
behind them. After dinner, Scully could hear Mulder
rattling around in the kitchen as he cleaned up the
dinner dishes while she settled Will into the safety
bath ring seat secured to the bottom of the bathtub
with suction cups. She felt her mood ease further as
the domestic sounds Mulder generated in the kitchen
filtered into the bathroom to compete with Will's happy
squeals. Scully let the baby play in the warm water
for several minutes and she gently splashed her hands,
causing the water to spray lightly into his face. He
shrieked and rubbed his fists against his eyes before
smacking his own chubby hands into the water in
retaliation. Scully reared back as the water splashed
up and drenched her shirt.
"Okay, Will. You win, this time." She soaked a soft
washcloth in the water and squeezed a small amount of
liquid soap into it. She handed him a yellow rubber
duck to keep his hands busy and quickly began to wash
him. She rinsed the soap from his sturdy body and
poured a bit of shampoo into her hand working a gentle
lather into his reddish-brown hair. Grabbing a plastic
cup from the shelf over her head, she filled it with
clean water and carefully rinsed the shampoo from his
hair. She lifted the baby from his seat and sent the
water swirling down the drain.
Scully carried Will into his room and dressed him in a
clean diaper and soft, fleecy pajamas. She sat him on
her lap and, turning her blow dryer onto the lowest
setting, blew his hair dry in a matter of minutes. He
normally played with the dryer, trying to grab it from
her hands, but he was sleepy tonight and by the time
his hair was dry, his eyes were drooping heavily and
she was able to lower him into his crib without the
requisite thirty minutes in the rocking chair. She
switched on the baby monitor and eased the nursery door
closed.
From their bedroom, Scully heard the sounds of the
television being turned on in the living room and the
rustling of the newspaper as Mulder settled onto the
sofa. She peeled off her soaked shirt and bra and
tossed them into the overflowing hamper. Her days
spent reading and researching had left her behind in
doing the laundry.
She pulled open the bureau drawer and yanked out the
first nightgown she found, pulling it over her head.
She quickly fastened the row of buttons that ran from
neck to waist and tied the satin ribbon between her
breasts into a bow. She shivered in the sleeveless
nightgown. Belting her robe around her waist, Scully
turned off the bedroom lamp and walked into the living
room.
Mulder looked up with a hesitant smile as she came back
into the room. He'd spent a great deal of his day
thinking - almost as much as he'd spent the night
before in front of the television. Luckily he'd had no
classes today and no lectures, because the day had
pretty much been a total waste for getting any work
done. By the time he could leave for home he'd decided
that yes, he had overreacted. He'd somehow driven
Scully to feel compelled to research sexual variety
because she thought he wanted it. And that wasn't it -
not at all...
Mulder knew one thing, and one thing only: he
cherished, adored and loved Dana Scully, madly. He
hated being out of sorts with her. He'd do anything to
make her happy, anything for her and for Will - and if
it meant dealing with her need to research, catalog and
take notes - then he'd deal with it.
His troubled eyes cleared when she curled up on the
sofa next to him with a medical journal in her hands.
Long moments passed with the quiet broken only by the
soft murmurs coming from the television and the
rustling sounds of his newspaper and her book.
"I'm going to make a cup of tea." She pushed to her
feet. "Do you want anything?" Mulder reached out to
play with her fingers for a few seconds before shaking
his head.
"No, thanks."
She squeezed his fingers with hers and then went into
the kitchen to brew the tea. When she returned to the
living room, Mulder had set the newspaper aside and was
slumped down against the sofa cushions watching a news
magazine on the television. Scully set her mug onto a
coaster on the end table and knelt down on the floor in
front of him. She pressed her hands against his knees
and pushed his legs apart, settling between his thighs.
"I'm sorry," she began. She shifted her weight and
rested her cheek against one of his legs. "I thought I
needed..." She cast her eyes around the room as if
hoping to find the right words painted on the walls,
before returning her gaze to his. "I thought I could
find what you wanted in a book."
Mulder sat up and leaned forward. His hand slid
beneath the heavy fall of her hair to curl around the
back of her neck. His rubbed his thumb over the vein
that pulsed with each steady beat of her heart. He was
struggling to give a voice to his desires.
"Baby, I'm sorry, too. I feel so badly for pushing you
into a situation where you thought you needed to go to
a book. I just wanted..." His stopped and cleared his
throat. "I thought we could try..." Again his words
trailed off. Scully inched closer and nodded her head.
"You thought we could try something new." Her fingers
tugged at the tie of her robe and she shrugged her
shoulders, allowing the robe to pool onto the floor
behind her. Her hands rubbed over his thighs and she
looked up with eyes both sly and hesitant at the same
time.
"You know," she paused and let her fingers toy with the
buckle of his belt. "It would be a shame to let
everything I learned go to waste..." She bit her lip
and waited. His response was immediate as desire
flared to life in his eyes and stirred under her hand.
Mulder watched as she unfastened his belt buckle and
flicked open the button of his trousers before easing
the zipper over his rising erection. Despite the anger
and hurt feelings of the previous night, he also
remembered the sudden rush of desire that had flooded
him when he had heard her reading aloud from her book.
His body had hardened instantly as he had stood in the
doorway listening to her, and he had wanted nothing
more than to pull her onto her knees in front of him.
Now she was there, kneeling - looking so goddamn
beautiful, wearing a nightgown he had always secretly
loved... tugging his clothing down his legs, peeling
his socks from his feet. She stretched up and undid
the row of buttons on the front of his shirt and pushed
it open to reveal the rapid rise and fall of his chest.
Her lips played lightly over his in a sweet, almost
chaste kiss, while her fingers kneaded the muscles in
his thighs. The soft cotton of her nightgown brushed
over his heated flesh and he groaned aloud. Jesus...
already the feelings she was arousing in him were not
to be believed...
Scully's mouth began to follow a downward path.
Lightly biting his jaw. Sliding wetly over his Adam's
apple. Her tongue sipped from the hollow at the base
of his throat and then she pressed an open-mouthed kiss
over his heart. She nipped and licked and bit her way
across the skin stretched tightly over his ribs and
then over the quivering muscles of his stomach. She
dipped her tongue into the sensitive crease where his
leg met his torso and threaded her fingers into the
tangle of coarse hair between his thighs.
"Stand up," she whispered. He rose on shaky legs and
gasped when she swirled her tongue over the head of his
penis. Scully peered uncertainly at him in the
shadowed room and when he nodded and tightened his hand
around the back of her neck, she lowered her mouth to
him again. She didn't concentrate on what the books
had instructed. Instead, she let instinct and a desire
to please him, and in turn, herself, take over.
Mulder's low moans and the soft, wet sounds of her
mouth moving over him filled the room. His fingers
were knotted in her hair, showing her what he liked
best. Scully's own hands were busy, stroking where her
mouth could not reach, cupping him and smoothing her
hands over his thighs. When she scraped her teeth
lightly over his sensitive flesh, she felt his legs
tremble and his knees buckle. She curved her hands
around his hips to steady him. The knowledge that she
was responsible for reducing this strong man to a mass
of shivering flesh was... very empowering...
She shifted, sinking back onto her heels, taking him
more shallowly into her mouth. Mulder cried out and
bucked his hips forward, urging her to pull him deeper.
Scully opened her eyes and looked up. Sweat gleamed on
his shoulders and face; dampened the sparse hair
covering his chest. He was watching her through the
veil of his lashes, but although he seemed to be
staring at his penis slipping in and out of her mouth,
she didn't recognize the faraway look in his eyes.
For Mulder, the sight before him was overwhelming in
its sheer sensuality. His woman, on her knees before
him, her mouth doing the most incredible things to him,
pure blue eyes smoldering up at him, hot wet tongue and
clever hands... red hair tousled underneath his
fingers.
Red hair... bright and soft and like silk rippling over
his wrists, as he held her head against him, moved
against her beautiful face, his engorged penis now deep
inside her mouth. But it wasn't enough, there was
something missing, something she did for him, to him...
something he wanted so badly to feel again because it
had been the most amazing thing he'd ever felt, and he
had to have it, feel it, again...
Mulder bent forward, again changing the angle and the
depth of penetration. He caught her hand with his free
one and dragged it over his flank, pressing one of her
fingers insistently against the puckered flesh between
his cheeks. His hand clenched involuntarily in her
hair, snarling in the soft strands painfully as he
shifted his stance and opened himself to her... he was
moaning, gasping... his hand pushed at hers, trying to
place it where he needed it, had to have it there,
right there...
And Scully was ripped from the moment and the safety of
their apartment and flung back into their room at the
Millcreek Inn. She tore her mouth from him and
scrambled backwards. Away from him. Away from the
blind desire clouding his eyes.
She crouched on the floor on her hands and knees and
stared up at him through tangled hair.
"Oh, my God..."
*********
Her raw, shaky voice snapped him out of the swimming
fog, and Mulder opened his eyes, shocked at the way she
cowered away from him. "Scully? Baby, what it is?
Why did you... what's going on?" Mulder took a
reflexive step forward, afraid that she had been hurt.
Scully flung up a hand and he halted in his tracks.
"Oh God... oh God... I didn't want to believe it..."
"What? Believe what?"
"Molly! All this time... and I thought... but I told
myself I was imagining things..." Scully climbed to her
feet but kept a cautious distance between their bodies.
His face was a picture of stunned confusion. "Molly?!
What the... what the hell has Molly got to do with
anything?"
"Ever since we came home... it's been Molly that you
want. Not me!"
Mulder was completely taken aback by her accusation.
"I don't believe... what the fuck would make you say
something so insane? You're talking about a GHOST,
Scully. A dead woman! Jesus!" He took another step
toward her.
Scully shook her hair out of her face and stood her
ground. "A ghost you had sex with... apparently the
greatest sex of your life!"
"Sex with a ghost. Are you nuts? It was YOU, Scully.
I was making love to YOU. YOUR body," he protested.
"My body, yes... but it wasn't me doing those things
with you... it was Molly." Her tone was strident with
anger and hurt.
He could feel himself splintering inside as he listened
to her. "I don't know what the hell you're talking
about. I was making love to the woman I love and she
was loving me right back. It was incredible, baby -
how can you say that wasn't you? I held you in my
arms! I was inside you, and everything you were doing
to me... Christ, it was so good! It was us together,
you and I - " He held out one hand in a pleading
gesture.
She ignored his outstretched fingers. "NO! Look, I
know... I know you thought it was me at the time,
Mulder... but God! You're the one who figured it out.
You're the one who told me the next morning. Damn it!
You know I'm right!"
Mulder was stunned. She was literally quivering with
rage and he felt his own temper flare in response.
"No. You're twisting this around because, for some
God-only-knows reason, you've suddenly decided you
don't want to experiment, try new things... not unless
it's something you can read and outline from some
goddamn sex manual!"
Scully fought down the hurt caused by his words and
savored the heat of her anger. "I can't believe you
said that... you know what, Mulder?" She slapped back
with her own spiteful words. "Before Molly fucked you
senseless, you were perfectly happy with the way we
made love."
He reeled back. "Fucked me... Jesus! The only one
that ever fucked me senseless around here was YOU! At
least, you used to... and now you're letting a fucking
ghost come between us. Of the two of us, I thought I
was the one who gravitated toward 'extreme
possibilities'..." He raked agitated fingers through
his hair. "You're the one who can't let it go, Scully.
Not me. You're the one who thinks I'm not happy.
Don't you get it? I love YOU. Not some spirit who
thought I was her long-dead boyfriend!"
"You're right. I can't let it go because you obviously
aren't happy. Why do you leave our bed every night?
Before we went to Lancaster, we fell asleep wound
around each other... now you sneak away as soon as you
think I'm asleep." She wrapped her arms around
herself, suddenly chilled in the sleeveless nightgown.
"Did you think I didn't know? That I wouldn't notice
your absence? That I wouldn't hear you shifting around
out in the living room every night - sighing
mournfully?"
She flung out a hand in disgust. "How am I supposed to
let it go... when you tell me not only with actions,
but with words, that you want me to be someone else?
Do you remember what you told me out there? You said
that I was a seductress... inventive and wild...
'wanton', I believe was the word you used. You told me
that one minute I was driving you out of your mind and
the next minute I ruined everything by pulling away
from you. How else am I supposed to take that?"
Scully's voice was low with remembered hurt.
Pure shock colored his tone and Mulder could hear it as
he protested, "Scully... how could you think I'm not
happy? I have everything in the world I ever wanted!
It's all I could think about when I was gone. Afraid
I'd never make it back to you... but I did make it
home, to discover that I was a father, too! I cherish
and adore both of you..." Mulder gentled his tone,
trying to regain control of the situation and to calm
both of them. "You're everything to me. You're taking
something I said during a stressful, trying time in our
lives, and making it seem as though I'm unhappy,
missing something. Hell, the only thing I'm missing is
you, in my arms!"
"So... you're telling me that this is all in my head.
That you are completely content with the idea that our
sex life should stay the way it was before we went to
Lancaster." She ignored the pleading look on his face,
intent on making him see what was really happening.
"And that... that this feeling I have deep inside that
you are not satisfied with our lovemaking is my
overactive imagination?"
"I don't know what I'm saying anymore. All I know is
that one minute we were making love and the next you
yanked yourself away as if I were some sort of
deviant." He paced the length of the room, trying to
walk off his frustration, but his own feelings were
deeply hurt by her accusations. "The look on your
face, Scully... it was as if you were staring at a
monster. I know we haven't had all that much time
together since Will's birth, but godammit... you know
me! Of course I love the way we make love! I was just
thinking it would be fun to try some new things...
that's all. I sure as hell didn't mean for you to feel
as though you have to take notes and study books as if
it were some sort of damn class!"
His cheeks were flushed with temper. "You say this is
the way you do things. You say you want this. And yet
the minute it's put to the test you pull away. And
blame it on something that happened two months ago,
something totally out of our control."
Scully's shoulders sank under the weight of his
allegations. They were getting nowhere. "I can't keep
doing this. We're just going around and around in
circles. Mulder... I never doubted your love for me.
And maybe I am blowing things out of proportion. I
don't... God, I just don't know what to think." She
stalked into their bedroom with Mulder following close
on her heels. "Maybe it's a pressure that I'm putting
on myself. Or maybe it's a pressure that you are
unconsciously putting on me, but I feel like I'm
competing with her for your attention."
Scully tore the nightgown over her head and hurriedly
stepped into a pair of jeans and a long-sleeved T-
shirt. "Molly, with all of her experience,
instinctively knew how to please you. I don't... I
don't have... it doesn't come naturally... what I...
God!" She swept up Mulder's keys from the bureau and
strode out of the bedroom toward the front door. "I
didn't mean to hurt you by buying those books and
studying them. I meant it when I said I wanted to try.
But I sure as hell didn't realize it meant recreating
that night!"
Scully curled her fingers around the doorknob and
yanked the door open.
"Where are you going?" he demanded.
"Someplace where I can be alone and think for a little
while." She leaned her forehead against the doorjamb.
"You may want to do the same thing," she said
sorrowfully and pulled the door closed behind her.
*************
Chapter Eight
Scully hit the steps of the apartment building at a run
and burst through the front door of the building. The
cold air of the mid-December night slapped at her.
I can't go back up there, she thought. She hurried
down the street to her car. She fumbled with the keys,
shivering with cold until she realized that she had
grabbed Mulder's set from the bureau before escaping
the apartment. She spun around and searched the street
for his car. A few minutes later, she was thawing out
as the heater blasted warm air into the car. When she
was no longer trembling with cold, she put the car into
gear and pulled away from the curb.
She drove aimlessly for long minutes as a million
jumbled thoughts raced through her head. Sitting at a
traffic light, she was startled when the motorist
behind her angrily leaned on his horn. She looked up
to find that the light had changed to green so she
drove through the intersection. She passed a shopping
mall and was surprised to see the crowded parking lot.
Scully glanced at the digital clock on the dashboard -
it was just a little after nine o'clock. For some
reason it seemed much later to her. Time passed slowly
when your life was falling apart.
Scully flipped on her turn signal and joined the short
line of traffic entering the parking lot. The mall was
open late - extended hours to accommodate the holiday
shoppers - and she pulled into the indoor parking
garage and turned off the motor. She reached over to
the passenger seat for her purse and realized that she
had raced out of the apartment without it. Pulling
open the ashtray, she scooped out the change that
Mulder kept there. Together with the two crumpled
dollar bills in the pocket of her jeans, she had enough
money to buy a cup of coffee.
***************
Mulder would still have been standing in the middle of
the room, staring at the closed door and hearing the
echo of its slam throughout the quiet apartment... if
Will hadn't chosen that moment to awaken, and screech.
The pitch of the cry in question had 'hunger' written
all over it. Mulder snapped out of his daze and headed
to the kitchen to warm up a bottle, hoping the baby
would take it gracefully and not reject it for the
mommy-milk whose 'regulator' just vacated the premises.
He moved quietly into the nursery, bending over the
crib, murmuring, "Hey, Willy... what's all the fuss,
huh? Come on, nothing can be that bad!" Will lay on
his back, feet kicking, red faced and little screwed-up
eyes leaking huge baby-tears. Mulder slipped a hand
into his sleeper; Will was dry so at least that wasn't
part of the trouble. Had to be hunger... Mulder picked
him up and cradled him gently against his shoulder;
Will snuggled close but continued to sob.
With a sigh, Mulder walked into the kitchen and
collected the warmed up bottle, pressing it to Will's
mouth. The fretful baby sucked on it for about two
seconds before spitting it out, and crying harder.
Mulder laid a hand against his forehead, noting Will
felt overly warm... sure enough, he was running a
slight fever. And that meant...
A gentle finger inserted into the baby's mouth
confirmed it, especially when Will grabbed hold of his
finger with both hands, and enthusiastically bit down.
Mulder smothered a groan. Another tooth breaking
through. No wonder the poor little guy was feeling
bad! He opened the freezer and rooted around for one
of Will's teething rings, finally locating it behind a
quart of Godiva ice cream. Carrying the ring, the
bottle and Will back into the nursery, Mulder pulled a
soft blanket from Will's dressing table and sat down in
the rocker, preparing himself for a teething siege.
As Will gnawed furiously on the icy teething ring,
Mulder wrapped the blanket around him, and thought
about what had happened earlier.
Scully's accusations had shocked the hell out of him.
Her abrupt transition from eager and sexy lover to
cowering victim had truly thrown him. The look in her
eyes... her body language - it was as if she'd
discovered herself making love to a stranger. And as
much as he'd refused to acknowledge, at the time... in
some way he'd felt like a stranger... had felt
different than Fox Mulder, lover of Dana Scully.
When they'd left Lancaster, Mulder had done his best to
put the whole bizarre experience out of his mind.
Molly Sullivan and William Foxworth had been reunited.
They'd left a realm in which they no longer had a
place, and had at last retreated to the world that
welcomed them, had been waiting so long for them.
The damage that Molly's spiritual possession had
wrought on Scully manifested itself the day after they
returned to DC, and had taken over a week to reverse;
her blood pressure had remained elevated as well as her
heartbeat. She'd slept for almost two days; awakening
only long enough to nurse Will when Mulder couldn't get
him to take a bottle filled with pumped breast milk.
Her appetite was practically non-existent, and Mulder
had fought his own panicky impulses, and had managed to
avoid nagging her to eat. Will had been fractious for
most of the recuperative period and it had been
difficult keeping him away from his mother, who'd
really needed her rest. Finally, after about a week of
frequent, restless sleeping and no appetite, Scully had
improved almost overnight and their lives had slowly
gotten back to normal.
Mulder gently rocked the chair, Will propped on his
shoulder and still awake but now snuffling tearfully as
the teething ring eased his sore gum. Mulder rubbed
his back soothingly as he let his mind drift, analyzing
the past hour - trying to piece it together.
He seemed to remember bits and pieces of that week at
Millcreek Inn, albeit different bits and pieces than
Scully had been able to recall. They'd both had
bizarre dreams - not exactly nightmares but certainly
not anything overly pleasant. Scully had mentioned
dreams in which the spirit swamping her consciousness
had refused to leave, even for her beloved Foxworth;
Scully would awaken from those dreams in tears and
gasping for breath. Mulder would hold her, rub her
back, until she fell asleep once more. And he'd remain
awake.
Scully had accused him of leaving their bed after
lovemaking, waiting until she was asleep to ease his
body away from her and spend the rest of the night
alone in the living room. And Mulder couldn't deny
it... he'd done exactly that. Only it wasn't always
because he just couldn't seem to fall asleep; had
another woman on his mind, as Scully had assumed...
quite a few times his reasons stemmed from the
disturbance of Scully's dream, and his inability to
relax after he'd soothed her back into slumber. He had
no idea she'd awoken again and knew he'd been restless.
It was another layer of misunderstanding, and one they
could ill afford.
As for his dreams... they'd centered around a hot, lush
mouth, kissing him, engulfing him - soft, damp hands
that caressed him, stroked him, enflamed him - blue
eyes burning so deeply into his that he'd become
mesmerized, consumed by a need such as he hadn't felt
in so very long - slender thighs opening to him,
rounded arms that twined through his and a body made
for loving... He'd awaken drenched in sweat, panting
and hard as stone and with his woman's name on his lips
- sitting upright in the big overstuffed chair in their
living room with a soft wool throw tenting over an
erection that had returned with a vengeance, even
though not two hours before he had been loved to
Heaven, and back.
He didn't want to even consider thinking about any
woman except Scully, not during intimacy whether real
or in dreams. The woman he'd held in his arms, who'd
given him these amazing experiences - had been Scully.
And yet... not.
Maybe the thing he couldn't accept, refused to
consider, was the knowledge that he'd been loved by a
stranger who just happened to look like Scully. And
when they'd been at the Millcreek Inn, when this
bizarre episode in their lives had actually happened...
Mulder had no trouble accepting it, even fighting to
make Scully believe it. So, why now was he in such
absolute denial?
Because. Because at that time the spirit of Molly
Sullivan had been firmly in place, fooling him. It was
- acceptable - he supposed was a good enough word -
because he hadn't known the woman in his arms was
anyone other than the one he adored. Now that ghost
was gone, and there wasn't anything he could use for an
excuse. That was pretty much the crux of it. He
didn't have a reason to want that 'other' side of
Scully - the side that really hadn't been her at all.
And yet... obviously he did want just that...
**************
Scully sat in a deserted corner of the nearly empty
food court and cradled her coffee cup between her
hands. She pursed her lips and blew a stream of cool
air onto the surface of the hot beverage. What's that
old expression, she wondered? 'A man wants a lady in
the parlor and a whore in the bedroom'. She set down
the cup and idly traced the abstract design of the
Formica-topped table with her thumbnail.
Yeah, she thought cynically. Well, if that's what he
wants, he can forget it. She moodily tore open a
packet of sugar and dumped its contents onto the table.
I'm not whoring myself for anyone, not even Mulder!
But it's not whoring when it's with someone you
adore... when it's an expression of love, a tiny voice
whispered in her brain.
Shut up! she snarled silently, effectively sending the
voice of reason scurrying off into the recesses of her
mind. Scully propped her chin in her hand and let her
eyes wander around the mall. Directly across from the
food court, less than fifty feet from where she sat,
was a lingerie store. The windows were filled with
mannequins dressed in skimpy bras, matching panties and
filmy robes. Scully watched as a man close to Mulder's
age hurried past the store. He stopped abruptly and
stared at a window display for several long seconds
before marching decisively into the store. Scully
craned her neck to get a better look at the display
that had captured the man's attention. A mannequin was
posed in a sheer red teddy, trimmed in faux white fur,
complete with matching Santa hat.
Ten minutes later the same man strode out of the store,
with a satisfied and expectant look on his flushed
face. In his hands he clutched the handles of a clear
shopping bag emblazoned with the store logo through
which Scully could make out a gaily-wrapped package.
Typical, she sneered to herself. Men buy trashy
lingerie and try to pass it off as a gift for their
woman... and every woman knows that he's really bought
it with himself in mind. Typical, she repeated.
Selfish. Her hand tightened around her coffee cup and
she cracked the fragile Styrofoam, spilling a small
river of lukewarm liquid onto the table.
Swearing, she leapt to her feet and hurriedly mopped up
the spill with the handful of napkins she had grabbed
at the coffee shop. She tossed the sodden mess into a
trashcan and wiped her damp hands against her jeans.
Leaving the food court behind, Scully wandered toward
the lingerie store. She sank down onto a bench and
stared into the store windows. That's what men want,
she thought. That's what Mulder wants. She studied a
large photograph of a famous model dressed in a maroon
velvet bra trimmed with sparkling beads and matching
thong underwear. A triple strand of pearls was looped
around the model's neck, nestling into her impressive
cleavage and her lips were pursed into a pout as she
coyly sat on Santa's lap and whispered into his ear.
In the background, an elf - who looked disturbingly
like Frohike in pointed shoes - peeked lecherously at
Santa and his... helper. Beneath the photograph was an
artfully arranged array of velvet bras in various
colors, along with the matching thong underwear.
Was this what women had to do to keep the attention of
the men in their lives? Dress up in fantasy-inspiring
clothes and pretend to be someone else? She looked at
the model - with her tousled-hair, voluptuous breasts
and impossibly thin waist and wondered how real women
were supposed to compete with the fantasy.
She couldn't compete. Mulder hadn't even seen Molly...
she had hidden in Scully's own body... and still, it
was obvious to her that she would never be able to
measure up to his memories of those nights when Molly
had kissed him and enticed him; aroused him and
satisfied him.
Scully thought of the drawer filled with pretty
undergarments back in the apartment and she knew that
it was not just men. Women would buy into the fantasy
as well. She had a weakness for lacy bras and panties
and had indulged in them even during the long periods
of abstinence that had made up most of her adult life.
She had worn them, because she had bought into the
fantasy... and because they made her feel sexy.
Feminine. Desirable. Even back at a time in her life
when it seemed that no one would ever touch her again.
************
Mulder rocked Will a little slower, tightening his grip
on his son, enough for the drowsy child to grunt softly
in protest, face puckered into an irritated pout.
Immediately Mulder eased his embrace, kissing the
baby's forehead. He wrapped the blanket more securely
round Will's little body and soothed a hand over his
back, hoping he'd give in to sleep soon... and thinking
hard about where to go from here.
Sex with Scully was wonderful... fact. They hadn't had
a lot of time to learn about what each of them wanted,
needed, in the bedroom... also a fact. They had just
begun to try different things, when they took their
fateful Lancaster vacation - big fact. Little wonder
that, when faced with a sexual dynamo inhabiting Dana
Scully, he'd gone off the deep end for her. Now, the
question Mulder had to ask himself: if allowed to
discover each other naturally, without an intrusive
third party... would the consequences have been the
same?
He honestly didn't know. And another unknown would be
whether or not he'd ever care about the difference.
His only surety was that he loved Scully, more than
life - and he couldn't lose her to something this
insanely unimportant. He had to MAKE it unimportant,
and then they needed to start over. He couldn't live
without her. And he wouldn't put her through any more
pressure, either consciously or otherwise. Somehow he
had to make her understand... whatever she wanted was
more than good for him. He adored her. And love was
far, far more necessary than sex... more vital and
lasting. Fifty years from now they'd be incapable of
more than a peck on the cheek and maybe a fumbling
clasp of gnarled, arthritic hands... but the love they
had for each other would be young and as strong as
ever. It was all that mattered.
Mulder stared out the window in the middle of the
night, rocking his teething son, waiting for Scully to
come home, so he could tell her, show her - make her
believe.
***************
Scully walked into the lingerie store and wandered
through the aisles, trailing a finger over the pastels
and jewel-tones of the shop's merchandise. Almost
without conscious thought, she gathered several items
into her hands and carried them toward one of the plush
dressing rooms at the back of the shop. She nodded
politely as the salesclerk offered her assistance and
waited for her to unlock the dressing room door.
Once she was safely behind the locked door, Scully
methodically stripped out of her clothes, noticing for
the first time that she had been in such a hurry to get
out of the apartment and away from Mulder that she had
not even put a bra on beneath her long-sleeved T-shirt.
She pulled the first item from the padded hanger,
dressed herself in it and stared into the mirror. The
black, baby-doll nightie was split down the middle,
held together between the breasts with a tiny, black
pearl button. Strategically placed embroidered flowers
drew the eye to her breasts and to the matching string
bikini. Scully smoothed her hand over her slightly
rounded belly, sucking in her stomach and arching her
back in an attempt to lift her breasts and mimic the
lush body of the model in the photograph.
Her breath left her in a rush and she sank down onto
the padded bench in the dressing room. Still staring
at herself in the mirror, she reflected that it had
been a very long time since she had felt sexy and
desirable.
She stood again and twisted her head, studying herself
from every angle in all of the mirrors. And what she
saw was a woman with tired eyes and tangled hair and a
body that would never be model-perfect playing dress-up
in a slinky baby-doll nightgown.
"What are you doing?" she whispered to the woman in the
mirror. "Who would want that?" She jerked her chin
derisively toward her image and turned from the mirror.
Mulder would. That tiny voice of reason whispered
again in her brain, and this time she didn't hurry to
hush it. Mulder would want you in lace and satin or in
cotton and denim. She thought of the joys to be found
in his lovemaking and of the tenderness of waking to
him in their bed, and she compared it to the last few
months of joyless sex and the empty expanse of their
bed when he crept from it in the middle of the night.
What did he expect of her... and perhaps more
importantly, what did she expect of herself? The
answers were not going to be found in the dressing room
of a lingerie store.
Two hours after she left, Scully slipped back into the
apartment. The living room was empty but a soft light
spilled from beneath the door of the nursery and she
could hear Mulder's low voice. She crept across the
room and leaned against the wall, peering into the
baby's room.
Mulder was seated in the rocking chair. His toes were
braced against the floor as he pushed the chair back
and forth on its rockers. Will was nestled in his
father's arms, his fingers playing with the buttons of
Mulder's shirt. He was fighting sleep, eyes drifting
closed under the hypnotic tone of Mulder's voice, only
to spring back open seconds later.
Mulder smoothed his fingers over the baby's cheek and
continued his story.
"The clock was counting down, ten... nine... eight...
seven... and I thought 'this is my chance!'...
six...five...four... she had saved my life earlier that
night - again! She was my beautiful, avenging angel at
the top of those stairs, and even more beautiful as she
wistfully watched the ball dropping in Times Square...
three... two...one! So, I bent down and I kissed her.
Our very first kiss, Will." The baby gurgled and
slapped his hand excitedly against his daddy's chest.
Mulder grinned, an almost faraway look on his face as
he continued, "And if I hadn't already been head over
heels in love with your mother, I would have fallen
right then and there."
Scully knuckled a tear from her lashes and stepped into
the room. Mulder looked up and his face was filled
with the same hope and hurt, fear and frustration...
love and longing that tied her stomach into knots.
She crossed the room and took Will from Mulder's
unresisting arms. The little boy snuggled his face
into the curve of her neck and she shifted her weight
from one foot to the other as she studied the familiar
curves and planes of Mulder's face. She felt the baby
sag in her arms as sleep finally claimed him and she
spoke to his father over the wispy curls that covered
his head.
"Can we talk about this?"
*********
Chapter Nine
Scully led the way out of the nursery and Mulder pulled
the door closed behind them. She glanced toward their
bedroom, but changed her mind - thinking that it might
be better to keep this conversation out of the bedroom.
She sank into the sofa cushions with a tired sigh and
Mulder eased himself down onto the coffee table, facing
her. He wanted badly to touch her, but she was rubbing
her hands nervously over her jeans-clad thighs.
"Scully..." His voice trailed off when she held up a
staying hand.
"Mulder," Her voice was soft. "May I go first?"
He hesitated for a moment before nodding his assent.
She flashed a grateful smile and continued to rub her
hands over her legs.
"I need you to let me say it all... without
interrupting." Her eyes bored into his. "Please?"
Again, he nodded and held out one hand in an invitation
for her to speak.
Scully drew in a deep breath and slowly, slowly exhaled
before beginning.
"First of all - I want to say that I'm not a prude. I
like sex. I love sex with you. And I want to be sexy
and exciting for you... for us.
"I guess I just never thought that there was anything
wrong with our love life. I know that it hasn't been
perfect - but nothing ever is for us. I arranged for
us to go to Lancaster, not only because I thought we
could use the vacation but also because I wanted to go
away and really make an effort to rediscover each
other. I know that since Will's birth, I've been
tired, sometimes too tired and I wanted to go someplace
where we could relax and just enjoy each being with
each other."
God! She had expected that this conversation would not
be easy - but it was worse than she had imagined. She
stared at her hands and plowed doggedly on.
"I knew things could be better, but I didn't realize
you were so dissatisfied. Shortly after we returned
home, though, I started to wonder if you were unhappy.
You kept climbing out of our bed in the middle of the
night. You seemed distant at times, lost in your
thoughts. It all seemed to lead directly back to our
vacation and that's when I began to wonder whether you
were thinking of Molly."
Mulder sucked in a breath and leaned forward as though
to speak, but without looking up, she shook her head
sharply to forestall him.
"I'm not accusing you of being unfaithful... I know you
love me and I know that in your heart and in your mind
you were making love to me in Lancaster, but since
we've been home..." Her voice trailed off. For her,
this was the heart of the matter and she had to word it
just right... she had to make him understand.
"I can't help but feel that you are comparing me with
Molly and that I keep coming up lacking in some way."
Her head lifted and she looked at him with pleading
eyes. "I didn't know what else to think. All of a
sudden, you seemed frustrated with our love life.
Suddenly it felt as though I wasn't enough anymore; I
thought you wanted me to be someone else...
"It was as if I was in some kind of competition with
her... and I was losing. Molly the wild seductress
versus Scully the boring mother."
She paused and buried her face in her hands.
"That's why I bought the books and studied them. I was
jealous!" Scully's voice was muffled as she continued
to hide her face. "I hated the fact that Molly's
lovemaking had been so exciting and unforgettable. I
wanted to drive her memory out of your head."
Her hands fell away from her face and she tiredly
leaned back into the sofa cushions and stared at the
ceiling.
"Every magazine, movie and television show drives the
message home to American women. It's not enough to be
smart. You have to be sexy. Beautiful. Thin but big-
breasted. You have to have a perfect body. And you
have to be a wild woman in bed."
She rolled her head against the sofa cushions to look
at him.
"When I realized that you were in love with me... I
knew that all of that hype was wrong. It was so
amazing to me..." Her voice was soft with wonder. "I
knew that you loved me - all of me - regardless of how
I looked, whether I was tired or grouchy or sick... You
loved me. And you wanted me."
Scully paused. She was tired, drained from the emotion
of the evening. She had rehearsed this speech all the
way home from the mall... so why did it sound so
incoherent now? To her own ears, she was rambling
without making any sense. But she couldn't stop. She
had to keep going until she could make him understand.
"When you suddenly started to want to do things
differently - when our lovemaking didn't seem to be
enough for you - that was proof to me that you wanted
me to be more like Molly.
"I did a lot of thinking while I was out tonight and...
I know you don't want to hear this, but I can't help
it. There IS a connection between your encounters with
Molly in Lancaster two months ago and your recent
dissatisfaction with our lovemaking."
His eyes had fallen to the carpet between his feet and
this time, she was the one to lean forward in an
attempt to emphasize her point.
"I want what we deserve. Time. Time to explore each
other; to learn everything about each other we don't
already know. In bed and out. But I've learned that
it has to come about naturally. It can't be forced.
It can't be based in jealousy and fear. And much as I
may think differently... it can't necessarily be found
in a book. And, Mulder, there's something else. I
remembered tonight that there is something more
important than any of that. I have no doubts you love
me and that you want me in any way you can get me. I
realize now you haven't consciously been thinking of
Molly or comparing me to her.
"I heard the story you were telling Will." For a
second, her lips curved in a tiny smile. "And I want
you to know, because I don't tell you often enough...
Mulder, I'm head over heels in love with you too."
This time she was the one who reached out a hand - and
relief flooded through her when Mulder linked his
fingers with hers, palm damp and a little shaky. They
stayed like that for a full minute, unspeaking, both
staring at their joined hands - then Mulder slowly
released her and the eyes he raised to hers were
glittering with emotion. Scully braced herself, hoping
what he had to say wouldn't hurt...
**************
Mulder took a deep breath as well, hardly knowing where
to start - so damn glad to hear her say she loved him,
that nothing else mattered. But, that wasn't true. It
did matter - his thoughts, his feelings. She'd been
honest with him, even though her words had cut. It was
his turn to afford her the same courtesy.
He locked eyes with her and fought to keep his voice
even. "I wish we'd never gone to Lancaster. If we'd
never gone we wouldn't be having all of these problems.
Because I truly believe we'd have discovered everything
about each other's sexual needs, naturally - in our own
good time." When she bent forward and her lips parted
as if to interject something, Mulder shook his head,
silently cautioning her not to interrupt.
"Don't get me wrong, Scully. I love that you wanted to
give me a vacation for my birthday. I love that you
thought of a haunted inn. Shit, who could know we'd
get caught up in a Revolutionary-War ghost story? And
that we'd become actively involved? Even I, with my
supposed 'nose' for the paranormal, couldn't have
predicted something that 'out there'." He shook his
head again, this time in self-derision at his steadfast
proclivity for finding the 'weird', and smiled a bit
when he saw her nod.
He murmured, "I wish we'd never gone because it hurt
you, Scully, physically as well as emotionally. It
took weeks for your body to recuperate from the damage
Molly's possession had rendered. I was so worried. I
could barely sleep at night, found myself watching you
to make sure you were breathing properly, for God's
sake.
"What it did to us... I can't even begin to sort all of
it out. Mostly because we're still learning each
other, baby. We may have known each other over nine
years but we're still learning. Intimacy with you...
it was something I'd longed for, ached for. I used to
wonder if it would ever happen, and if I ever deserved
for it to happen. When you first told me you loved me,
first showed me... it was amazing. I'd needed you for
so long... years. When it finally happened, I was
beside myself with happiness."
The emotion in his voice was enough to make both of
them tear up - and they did. Mulder took another
fortifying breath, determined to get through it all.
She needed to hear it, all -
"We only had a few chances between us, Scully - to make
love. To create the life that became Will. I was
taken and gone for all those months, and when I
returned you were so pregnant that you knew there
wasn't a way in hell I was going to jeopardize you by
expecting sex. It was enough to be back with you. Our
time would come and I was content to wait for it.
"After Will was born you were so sick, baby. And you'd
only been healed and really functioning again for a
little over a month when we went to Lancaster. I was
looking forward to that trip as much as you were. I
had hoped we could finally start learning about each
other. Well, obviously it didn't happen that way."
Another deep breath; needing to touch her, Mulder again
took hold of Scully's hand, caressing her fingers. It
was so difficult to keep his voice from cracking when
he continued, "I know I hate to think about it this way
but you're right. Another woman got to me first, took
advantage of me before you could. I never knew, Scully
- how could I? Never in my wildest dreams could I
imagine a ghost would take you over, make you do those
things to me. I thought it was you. I thought it was
your way of showing me - what you liked, what you
wanted us to do together. And it was the same things I
had wanted to do with you - the very same. Of course I
went off the deep end! All my dreams were coming
true."
He met her eyes and the pain he saw in those blue
depths tore at him. And the knowledge that his next
words could fuck up their entire future, made him speak
with raw intensity. "When I realized it wasn't you, I
was crushed. I felt like something had been stolen,
from both of us - the chance to discover, and to learn.
And deep inside I guess I knew we'd have problems
dealing with it when we got back. And sure enough, we
are.
"I accept the responsibility for just about all of it,
Scully. The side of you I saw in Lancaster was
fabulous, but it wasn't you. Not really. And now
we'll never know for sure if it could have been you,
and me responding to you - because that chance has been
taken away from us. I feel like we have been cheated.
And I don't want to feel that way. I could so easily
ignore it, tamp it down - but that's not honest of me.
And above all else, our love has to be honest. Like
everything else with us." His gaze clung to her - he
knew he was about to beg - and he didn't care that his
male pride was in danger of being permanently
eradicated. His pride was nothing - Scully and their
life together was the only important constant.
He whispered brokenly, "I don't want to pressure you.
I don't want you to think I find you anything but
desirable and sexy and exactly what I need in my life -
for the rest of my life. You are everything to me,
Scully - you and Will. I breathe you... God, don't you
know that? If you were gone I'd surely die. I
couldn't go on. Not even for Will, God help me. I'm
not that strong, even though everyone thinks I am. I
know exactly where my weaknesses are - right at your
feet. Same place as my heart.
"I'll do anything to get past this. I'll go to
counseling with you if you think we should, I'll leave
you alone if that's what you need. If you want to get
away from me and think, need time apart - I'll request
a leave of absence and take care of Will. Anything you
want. Only don't leave me for good, baby. Don't cut
me from your life. I love you so much, Scully. I love
you."
Heart pounding, eyes blurred by tears, Mulder found
himself holding his breath -
And Scully fell onto her knees in front of him;
inserted herself between his spread legs. She wound
her arms tightly around his neck and clung to him with
all of her strength.
"Never, Mulder. I'll never leave you." Her voice
sounded as raw and broken as his...
A shudder wracked his frame and his arms tightened
convulsively around her as she molded herself to him.
So many other things had threatened to tear them apart
in the past. They had prevailed through heated
disagreements, perceived betrayals, abductions, cancer,
enforced separations and the loss of loved ones.
Clinging tightly to one another, they knew that none of
those things had come as close to destroying them as
the interference of one sad and lonely soul who had
spent centuries searching for her lost love.
Tonight, they would begin to truly lay the ghost of
Molly Sullivan to rest.
The End
Authors' Notes:
We know that there is a strong possibility that this
story is not exactly what the readers were expecting
and if you're reading these notes, we appreciate the
fact that you stuck with us to the very end. We
thought long and hard about the ending of this story
and we knew that it wouldn't be realistic to tie it up
with a pretty bow and make everything better in a
flash. But we felt that we left them in a good
place... in love and in a stronger place in their
relationship to take things forward from this point on
and make a happy life together. We hope you feel the
same way.
This has been quite a journey. We'd like to thank the
readers first and foremost for the wonderful feedback
we received on Book One... and for the encouragement we
received to continue the story in Book Two. You've
been very patient. We hope that you enjoyed this story.
Our beta-team. Rafferty, Aly and Sallie - what an
amazing trio of women. Our heartfelt thanks to them
for taking the time to read Book Two and give us their
honest opinions, valued beta and for being sounding
boards for us. The story is all the better for their
contributions. An additional heaping of thanks goes to
Aly for maintaining Tess' website.
Tess: In addition to our joint thank you's, of course,
I must thank Char for her friendship and for sharing
her talent with me. I enjoy writing all the more when
I'm writing with Char.
Char: I can honestly say that the best writing
experiences of all come from pairing up with Tess. And
when she came up with not only the outline for Book
One, but also Book Two - I knew the story needed to be
written. I also know I would not have known how to
begin, had it not been for Tess and her insight - and
her immense talent. Thank you, Partner Mine!
You can find this and all of our other stories (joint
and solo) at our websites:
Char.chaffin.com and
Tess' stories have a new home at: www.tessfiles.com